Knights of God: Episode 10

"To Canterbury!"

A lot happens this episode. At the outset, Gervase and Julia are outlawed and outcast; Hugo is disgraced and imprisoned; and Mordrin may wish to be crowned king, confirmed at the cliffhanger.

The whole direction of travel changes here. Arthur, it seems, has not forsaken the couple, and suddenly mentions a rumout that the king is alive... and the Archbishop of Canterbury, obviously no friend of the new Fascist religion, would possibly know. To Canterbury, then. It's a little deflating, however, that the only hope against Fascism is the monarchy and the established Church.

Things don't look good for Hugo, despite his refusal to sign the confession waved in front of him; he is to be tried and then hanged the following morning. But Gervase and Julia are in peril too, betrayed once more by the treasonous leader of the "Wastelands". Yet, with the help of Julia's father, they are able to reach Canterbury...

Exciting and intriguing. Not long now...

Knights of God: Episode 7

 "Being with you. That's all I ever thought of."

This middle episode is surprisingly eventful and fast-moving as we seem to be moving into a new phase. The world, and the characters, are well fleshed out by now. Of course, Gervase survives the cliffhanger- only to face another at the end, at the hands of a few terrifying Yorkshiremen from the "Wastelands"- but much changes between these two events.

Gervase and Julia are, indeed, reunited, and it's all very sweet. But they are thrust immediately into a shootout, in which Julia's kind farmer's wife benefactor dies heroically but with the young lovebirds escaping. Meanwhile Arthur delivers some more vague but fasdcinating exposition to an unknown military figure, not realising that Gervase, though otherwise himself again, is conditioned to kill him.

Elsewhere, Mordrin learns of Hugo's treachery; it seems this subplot is coming to a head sooner than expected. And it seems that next episode we will learn more of the people of the Wasteland.

I'm loving the world here, the dystopia with BBC computers, as well as the unpredictable plot. And the series keeps improving as it goes on. Thgis shouldn't be so obscure.

Knights of God: Episode 6

" Fire!"

An episode of skulduggery here, yet not one without  the pulling of heartstrings. Scenes with both Julia and Gervase make it c;lear that they love each other. It's cute. Alas, this is a world too devious for such furity of feeling. Mordrin manipulates Gervase further, setting him free to find Julia yet reinforcing- in an extraordinary scene- the hypnotic suggestion to kill Arthur, the enemy with whom he is obsessed.

Yet Brother Hugo plots. The scenes between hiom and Mordrin are great; you can feel the mutual loathing. And Hugo has his own underling to play like a fiddle, again to kill Mordrin. It's a nice parallel as both the leader and the Deputy of the Knights are scheming to different ends. So the cliffhanger shows Gervase in dire peril.

There is humanity too: Arthur is tender and understanding with Gervase's mother. But this is a bleak, bleak world. And a fascinating one. This arc must be near complete but we have quite far to go...

Knights of God: Episode 3

 "Aim..."

Crikey, this is bleak, bleak stuff and an unflinching study of fascism. And this is a kids' programme? 

Things take an unexpected turn; Julia and Gervais don't end up escaping afgter all, their acts of sabotage being far too serious fr the punishment block... and when Mordrin arrives they are interrogated while being sleep deprived and forced to stand for hours. Things are already pretty damn intense by the time they are separated and Mordrin begins the real mind games.

It's an impossible choice. Gervais must sign a document renouncing his father and the rebellion, and pledging to become a Knight of God, or Julia will be summatrily executed by firing squad. The tension is horrifying... and poor, brave Julia gets to experience all the suffering of thinking she's about to die until the execution is called off.

Surely a promise brought about by coercion is worthless? Regardless, this is devastating, brilliant telly.

Knights of God: Episode 2

 "Worshipping a god of power, strength, and vengeance..."

We begin with a "previously on"... and then it's straight to a concenttration camp. In England. It's not an extermination camp, but it's bloody grim, a place of brainwashing, indoctrination and mind crushing military style discipline without purpose. We see, too, that Prior Mordrin can only maintain a semblance of order by the ceraseless executions of those who would be free.

It's grim. It's bleak. This 2020 may actually be worse than the one we got, and that's saying something.

We get a bit of exposition- throughout the '90s there was conflict between a rich south and a poor north, an interesting perspectibve from the Thatcherite '80s, leading to civil war. And somehow the Knights of God took over, replacing Christianity with a harsh religion of vengeance. Like the concentration camps, this has certain historical echoes.

Gervase suffers the camps but is slowly falling in love with the rather lovely Julia. Shre has a plan to escape via, er, being put in the cooler. It's a good thing too. Because his dad Owen is rumbled, tipped off by Arthur in another delightful scene between Gareth Edwards and Patrick Troughton. But they'rer on to Owen and, via their incredible futuristic computer power, they're on to Gervase.

This is excellent stuff. But bloody hell it's dark for kids' telly.

The Sarah Jane Adventures: Secrets of the Stars

Part One

“This time, Sarah Jane… you lose.”

I liked this a lot more I did on the original broadcast. In fact, I liked it quite a lot. Russ Abbott is great, giving exactly the sort of performance that’s needed- a bit of scenery chewing, yes, but that’s the character. And while the rationalist in me once worried about the use of astrology here in a children’s programme, this time round I’ve lightened up a bit. We don’t really need an explicit “Astrology is a load of pants, mmmkay?” Still, I like the comments Clyde makes.

I love the very succinct pre-titles sequence, where Trueman admits that he’s a fraud before, suddenly, he’s not. And the regular characters are dealt with well, too. I really like the treatment of Rani’s parents- they’re quite friendly with Sarah Jane and therefore less likely to show any tiresome suspicion about what she’s up top with their daughter. Plus Gita continues to be lovely. And Rani gets some nice treatment with the “apprentice journalist” angle continuing- also of course one of the reasons why her parents seem to be cool with their daughter hanging out with this mysterious woman from over the road.

I love the confrontation scene between Sarah Jane and Trueman; at first it’s a clash between the worlds of reason and superstition but evolves into some delightfully entertaining chewing of the scenery. And, unusually, we get a fairly coherent explanation of what’s going on; astrology hails from a previous universe where astrology works. I’m picturing Russell Grant as a Great Old One. That’s not a sentence I ever envisioned myself writing.



Part Two

“Mars has entered the Milky Way and Aero is in conjunction with the Galaxy.”

It’s such a shame that, in a story with such a strong plot and some genuine twists courtesy of Gareth Roberts, the recap at the start should contain such a blatant spoiler. Among a very few scenes from last episodes is one in which Luke reminds us that he wasn’t born and has no star sign- we can immediately guess how it’s going to end. But then again, perhaps that’s me as an adult being unfair and this sort of thing is appropriate to the young children watching. That’s my problem with fully enjoying The Sarah Jane Adventures, really: I’m just not the target audience.

The situation gives us a real sense of threat and of the clock ticking as Trueman takes over everyone, star sign by star sign. The stakes are high: not only do we get the now-traditional montage of world news, but even Trinity Wells herself has been taken over! But more immediate, of course, is Clyde, and his escape from mind control is a nice clue to the audience of how all this is going to be resolved.

I really like Sarah Jane’s comment that “I know what it’s like to be taken over”…

So, not quite good enough for top marks, but a solid piece of drama, and a 4/5. But I’m beginning to wonder whether a 33 year old man like me is really competent to judge!

The Sarah Jane Adventures: The Day of the Clown

Part One

“Both of you- promise you’ll never breathe a word about what we do.”

Well, we’ve come across clowns twice before in the Marathon: in The Celestial Toymaker and The Greatest Show in the Galaxy. But by this point the gradual shift in the perception of clowns is almost complete, and the “clowns are creepy” meme has completely taken over. Everyone in this story seems to find clowns unnerving right from the start, and I certainly do.

Blimey. Been a while, hasn’t it? At least for the last week and a half I’ve had the excuse of my right arm being in a sling which made it rather hard to take notes, but the hiatus in my Marathon has been going on for several months longer than that! I just ran out of steam for a bit, really. Plus I was less than enthused with the prospect of a season of Sarah Jane Adventures to put behind me before I get to the stuff I want to see, but on the other hand determined not to skip anything as I’ve come so far without doing so. Still, I’m definitely back now, and at a pre-hiatus pace of several reviews a week. It’s a New Year’s resolution and everything. Honest!

Phil Ford’s back, and so’s Michael Kerrigan, helming what I believe to be his first story in the wider world of Who since Battlefield. And there are still echoes of Maria, and rightly so. But this story is mainly about the new family moving in at Bannerman Road, and the introduction of Rani. It’s quite a shock in the context of the Marathon to see a character who seems to have been around so long being introduced so late on.

The whole conceit of Rani’s dad, Haresh, being the headmaster is rather well developed throughout by means of his rather amusing antagonism with Clyde, but this does come at the cost of the character appearing as something of a caricature during his early scenes. Still, Rani’s mum, Gita, is lovely and warm, has a very pleasant Lancashire accent, and gets a nice introduction scene with Sarah Jane coming round with some tea and sarnies. (Aren’t people so much more neighbourly on the telly than in real life? Sarah Jane is supposed to be a bit of a recluse, as well.) Plus she’s played by Nina Anwar, who, in one of those nice Actor Spotting Moments that have added so much to the Marathon, played Constable Habib in The Thin Blue Line. I’ve, er, got a bit of a crush on her.

Oh, and how come Sarah Jane doesn’t like it when Gita calls her “Sarah”? It seemed to be fine for the Doctor and Harry to do it but not now, apparently.

There’s not a lot of plot this episode but that’s ok; we need to introduce Rani. The concept of the clown works rather well in that respect as we can get lots of creepy premonitions of what is to come without anything having to happen. We finish with the plot all poised to start…



Part Two

“Annoying ringtones have their uses.”

Rani is rather nicely made a member of the team here as Sarah Jane’s reluctance is simply overtaken by events. I like Rani; she’s brave, inquisitive and has a very different, more light-hearted, family set-up than Maria did.

I had a bit of a Fanboy moment at the bit where Sarah Jane’s looking at pictures of clowns on her laptop and up pops Clara the Clown from, er, classic tale The Celestial Toymaker.

The plot is by-the-numbers here, although there’s a nice moment between Sarah Jane and Professor Rivers of the Pharos Institute, played by everyone’s favourite Lib Dem peer Floella Benjamin. Also, Gita continues to be fab as she walks into an invisible wall without even spilling any tea. Classy.

The ending is surprisingly effective, with Clyde making a load of actually rather good jokes and an almost Gaimanesque element of the dark side of fairytale in the image of children caught by the Pied Piper being kept in a kind of limbo ever since Hamelin, but fading away after a time. Brr! 3/5, I suppose: somewhat by-numbers, but a nice introduction for Rani.

Doctor Who: Battlefield

Part One



“And boom!”

“Boom?”

“Boom!”

A garden centre. Whoopee. How very exciting. But hang on- it’s the Brig. With Doris, she of the name checking in Planet of the Spiders! How very fanwanky. But it’s great to see the Brig again, even though all the dialogue in this scene is a bit of a crude info-dump (“What, giving up teaching?”)

And we get UNIT too, now a proper UN organisation with blue berets and a few token foreigners to prove it. And there’s a new Brigadier, played by Angela Bruce, the female Lister from the most recently broadcast episode of Red Dwarf. She’s great. Her catchphrase isn’t. And it’s a bit odd how Zbigniew calls her “sir”. Hasn’t she noticed she’s, er, a she?

Blimey, it’s a bit dark in the TARDIS. It’s almost as if they were trying to hide the fact they’ve managed to dump most of the console room between seasons. The Doctor is also a bit darker with his new jacket. Symbolism, perhaps? There’s talk of “sideways in time” which alerts all those aware of how this show works that this is where the baddies are going to come from. They’re following a signal from Earth “a few years” in Ace’s future, a signal consisting of just the word “Merlin”. Oooh! We never do find out what it was.

The Doctor’s great when infiltrating himself with UNIT. I love the old-fashioned pocket-emptying, the passes, his reply to Winifred’s “I think I would have noticed a nuclear explosion.” With “Yes, they are conspicuous.” But he’s even better being all brooding and mysterious about this Arthurian stuff, at least now where the possibility of it all making sense by the end still seems open.

If Patrick’s “Arthur’s Ale” is approved by CAMRA then it must be damn good, but the script seems to mock it, especially with the philistine comments of Ace’s explosive-loving mate Shou Yuing. Bah. Apparently Ben Aaronovitch is not a real ale lover. Disgraceful. Shouldn’t be allowed. All right-thinking people love real ale.

Still, the coolness of the Doctor apparently having a Zoid in his pocket rouses me from my ranting state of mind as the knights with guns suddenly appear and start shooting at each other all over the place. I’m not sure what good the mediaeval armour’s supposed to be doing them under the circumstances, but I understand Aaronovitch intended it to look a lot more futuristic, which would have made a lot more sense and been a lot cooler.

I love the Brig’s constant assurances to Doris that he’s definitely not going to get killed, which were clearly put there to foreshadow his Beowulf-esque demise until Aaronovitch decided otherwise.

We finish by meeting Ancelyn, who recognises Merlin, and then some baddie knights. All this looks good mostly, and there are some cool concepts flying about, but I’m with Shou Yuing when she asks “Can someone tell me what on Earth is going on?”



Part Two



“Yes, remember Badon and my mighty arts!”

For years until I first saw the DVD with subtitles I thought the above quote was about a “mighty arch”. Anyway…

These knights are from another dimension. One of them, Mordred, is obviously a key figure from Arthurian legend, but I don’t think Ancelyn is. I’m still not sure exactly what’s going on, or how it’s all supposed to relate to the mythology, if at all beyond the superficial.

Mordred’s insane laughter is… an interesting approach. The Doctor’s use of a crisp packet to wake up Winifred and Ancelyn is much cooler, and I love the humorous way their relationship develops throughout the story.

A couple of niggles though; who got Geneva to call in the Brig, and why? Is Winifred not considered capable? And then there’s the ridiculously slow pace of Peter Warmsly’s archaeological dig. It would have taken the Time Team crew a bit less than ten fricking years to sort that load of trenches out. And then there’s Morgaine’s confrontation with the Brig at the cemetery- good scene, yes, but what are the Thirteen Worlds, and who are the S’Rax? And why is Arthur in a sodding spaceship under the lake? What’s happening?


Part Three



“Something’s wrong.”

“What?”

“We haven’t been attacked yet.”

So, Warmsley thinks the whole Arthurian thing’s “a bit of a myth really,” in spite of the fact he’s spent ten years digging a site whose only apparent worth is its connection with the legend? Still, it’s cool to see Ace emerge from the lake with Excalibur.

The Doctor and the Brig finally meet, and I love the Brig’s casual attitude to the fact the Doctor’s changed again; “Who else would it be?” We get Bessie too. But the best bit is of course where the Doctor stops the battle. I don’t mean “THERE. WILL. BE. NO. BATTLE HERE!” but the hilarious insults Mordred and Ancelyn throw at each other.

I still have no idea what’s going on, mind.



Part Four



“Exotic alien swords are easy to come by. Aces are rare.”

I admit the Destroyer looks good, whoever he is. This story is getting more and more like an episode of Angel as it goes on. Except nowhere near as good, obviously.

Everything in this story, with the Brig knocking the Doctor out so he can get the final confrontation, is clearly signposting his heroic sacrifice. I’m glad it doesn’t happen though. Full of nice little Brig moments though it is, this story isn’t really worthy of being the Brig’s swansong.

The Doctor’s talking Morgaine out of using the nuke sort of works, I suppose, and I like the note left from his future self. That doesn’t mean I have any idea what’s been happening, though. And it’s with good reason that everyone always asks exactly how they’re supposed to “lock up” Morgaine.

Still, there’s something about this story’s heart that’s in the right place. We may get the very Scooby Dooiest of Scooby Doo endings, but in a good way.


Well, that made no sense. There’s also a sense, although to a lesser extent than Silver Nemesis, that things have been edited so tightly as to affect the clarity of the narrative. And it’s not directed all that well either. But the main problem is the many basic things that aren’t explained- we learn nothing of who Morgaine’s lot or Ancelyn’s lot actually are, where they came from or what they want. And because, unlike last story, this story isn’t abstract or allegorical- it’s not about anything other than the plot itself, not even Arthurian myth in any meaningful way- these things matter. Still, it diverted me, had some good set pieces and some fun humour. A highish 2/5.