Monday 30 September 2019

The Sopranos: Pilot

“Here comes the Prozac...”

If you suspect that I’m starting The Sopranos mainly because I need some brain food to go alongside the not-exactly-intellectual Batman and Robin movie serial, you’re right. I’m only going to do the first season for now and then pause, but it’ll be enjoyable. I’ve seen this season, and this season only, before- on BBC2 in 1999, in my bedroom in my parents’ house, when I was 22. I suppose, prior to 1999 and HBO coming out with this, we Brits, while consuming a lot of American telly, considered it, on average and with many obvious exceptions, to be more lowbrow than our telly with its formulaic, 22 episode seasons. The Sopranos, and its ushering in of the golden age of American telly through which we’re living, changed that forever.

It’s an impressive start with the titles, a splendid tune, and spectacular views of the New Jersey turnpike, and then we begin- with Tony Soprano, in a shrink’s waiting room, looking at a statue in a scene which pretty much exists to show us, by being artily directed, that we are to expect cleverness. And so we have the early awkward exchanges as Tony and Dr Melli size each other up, he relating how he came to have his recent panic attack- we learn about his failing marriage with Carmela, his son Anthony being (as we see) a bit of a dick and a rather epic row between Carmela and their daughter Meadow. But there is also, of course, his other “family”, the family business of “waste disposal” and the rather hilarious juxtapositions of violent scenes and narration such as “we had coffee”. Dr Melfi, of course, knows. But she doesn’t “know”.

Worse than this, though, are the looming crises. Tony’s mother, Livia (an interesting name of one happens to have recently blogged I, Clavdivs) is the mum from Hell- dramatic, judgemental, hypocritical, resentful, with a degree in passive aggressiveness. And then there’s Junior, Tony’s uncle, the older brother of his late father, a proud and prickly old man who resents To t being boss and not him. Then there’s his arrogant dick of a nephew, Christopher. All this in a world where the Mafia is in decline, being squeezed by the law, and living in the glories of old movies, its future bleak and the old code of Omertà no longer a given. Oh, and Tony is having an affair with a trophy girl while Carmela is hanging around with a handsome priest who, to his credit, at least prefers the first Godfather movie.

There’s lots of wit but the fourth wall is never quite broken- I love that Junior (an absurd “name” for an old man!) is going to “whack” “Big Pussy” at the restaurant of Tony’s friend, ruining his business- the main A plot of the episode, solved by a judicious bit of arson, and Tony says “You think he’s gonna fuck with Big Pussy? My pussy?”... All is player straight, of course. And James Gandolfini is incredible, portraying real depth and subtlety.

We end, though, with a menacing exchange between Junior- a stupid old bigot who resents the old days of “the crazy hair, and the dope” and now whinges about that old ‘90s battleground of “fags in the military” and Livia, as “things may have to be done” about Tony.

This is simply superlative television, from the very start. I’m going to enjoy this.

Sunday 29 September 2019

The Last Man on Earth (1964)

“You’re freaks, all of you!”

I never did read Richard Matheson’s novel, or any of the other film adaptations, which made me pleasantly unspoiled for this strange little English language Italian film, starring Vincent Price and some Italian actors with impressive language skills, much though the concept reminds me of Day of the Triffids.

What I particularly love about this is that it’s a proper tragedy, not just in the sense of misfortune but how Dr Morgan exhibits hubris, and a tragic flaw. This turns it from a fascinatingly done but nonetheless fairly predictable post-apocalypse world into something more, and allows a trust ending.

Most of the film is taken up with Morgan’s daily life as the last man alive, using garlic, mirrors and plentiful cars to loot so he can survive and slowly kill as many sleeping vampires as he can during the daytime. He even keeps track of the date (civilisation ended in 1965!) for the benefit of nobody but himself, a defiant gesture. This is interspersed with flashback scenes of the “bacterium” slowly killing off civilisation and humanity, including his wife and daughter, until he is utterly alone- organised, determined but empty inside. Vincent Price, cast very much against type, gives a magnificent performance here which is very different from the parts he usually plays, although sadly his appearance and voice mean that Richard Mathewson was probably right to consider him miscast.

The final minutes of the film are a hammer blow- at first it seems Morgan is not alone, but the other survivors are merely infected people who are able to manage their condition with medication. They kill him because, amongst the vampires he has killed, have been some of their people and he, the last remaining “pure” human, is a threat. Morgan does knowing that humanity and civilisation will indeed eventually survive- without him. It’s a devastating twist for a rather good little film.

Wednesday 25 September 2019

Batman and Robin: Episodes 10 and 11

Episode Ten: Batman's Last Chance

"We hae to square things with the guy whose car we took!"

You know the drill; this is a movie serial and thus has no characterisation whatsoever beyond the basics, nor does it have a plot beyond a loosely connected series of set pieces until the whole thing ends. This means none of the suspects are investigated as Batman and Robin are far too busy being peril monkeys to do any detective work, which by this point is making them look a bit thick. Indeed, after the outrageously cheating cliffhanger resolution- a new scene is inserted where our not-so-dynamic duo jump out of the car, Batman almost seems to admit to Robin that they’ve been a bit crap and he’s worried, especially as he’s asked the commissioner to let Jimmy go but not bothered to watch him. Although, of course, I’m probably overanalysing g; it’s not as though any of these characters have any interiority beyond pure plot function.

I have to wonder, though- the only movie serials I’ve seen have been this and (circa 1990) the earlier Batman with the wartime racism. Are they all quite like this?

Anyway, there’s more intrigue with Jimmy, who finally decides to help his sister, in a tall office block where the baddies have an exciting gadget that can see through doors. And Batman gets into a fight during which he opens a window in the umpteenth floor for no particular window, and plunged to his apparent doom. Sigh.



Episode Eleven: Robin's Ruse

"Can you prove it was Batman?"

Wow. This is actually a clever cliffhanger resolution- it was Jimmy in Batman’s costume, not Barman himself, who plunged to his doom, and we get a flashback. Just let’s not think too hard about why Jimmy would want to dress as Batman, or why a conscious Bruce would let Jimmy steak his costume- and see his face.

Soon, though, the Wizard and co dismiss the the theory that Jimmy was the Batman and alight on a much better suspect- Bruce Wayne, whom they decide to kidnap. Thus we have a whole episode based on Robin rescuing Bruce while (with help from a spandex-wearing Alfred!) he convinces them that Batman is with him. The Wizard and his goons are sufficiently stupid that even the bit-very-bright Batman and Robin can run rings around them, although they are still no closer Toni castigating any of the suspects they have, being far too busy with boys’ own set pieces.

Still, only four episodes left. Could we be about to get some actual plot...?

Tuesday 24 September 2019

Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy: Flushing Out the Mole

"Poor George. Life's such a puzzle to you, isn't it?"

Ah. You know how I’ve been saying that yes, Tinker Tailor is bloody good, the acting is superlative, the slow pace is excellent and the whole thing is superb but not quite in the very first rank? Well, I’ve changed my mind. Sometimes it’s the impact of a final episode that can fully drive home a multilayered and complex subtext, and this final episode is both extraordinary in itself and defines the entire series. I suspect also that there are all sorts of scriptural references I’m not getting.

Yes, this is the episode where the mole is unmasked,  and the first ten or so minutes are a suspenseful whodunit, but that’s over quickly. Gerald is caught, he’s Bill Haydon, and suddenly the world is entirely different. The whole senior echelon of the Circus are summoned to hear the tapes of Haydon speaking to his handler, and you can see from the previously supercilious Percy Alleline that he’s utterly defeated. The tables have turned, and the outcast Smiley suddenly commands the room, a situation that lasts for most of the episode. Toby in particular is suddenly very, very oleaginous.

We see where Jim Prideaux has gone- he’s watching as Bill is taken to a camp and, quite obviously, roughed up. Everyone is shocked that good old Bull, outgoing, patriotic, the “laughing cavalier” should be a traitor. But Ian Richardson is extraordinary in explaining his motives to Smiley- they all started at the Circus when they were “golden with hope”, and Bill gradually came to hate America for its callousness towards its own poor, presumably meaning its cruelly inadequate welfare system and its lack of a decent health system- but was the Soviet Union any better? America may never have had an NHS, but neither did the USSR. Bill, though, with the cynicism of the defeated idealist, comes to see, as early as the Forties, that Britain is a fading, irrelevant power. None of this explains his motives satisfactory but that, in itself, makes him seem real.

Even his affair with Ann was directed by Karla- he was to “join the queue” to make any suspicion from Smiley feel like a personal thing. And yes, he shafted his old partner Jim. He is a traitor in every way. But he’s an unsavoury character in other ways- he tries to pay off not only a girlfriend but a “boy” who is “a cherub but no angel”. I assume we’re not talking over sixteen here. Brr. This was hardly approved of in 1979 but there was perhaps more of a tolerance for a kind of public school pederasty that makes the flesh creep.

Fittingly, Bill is killed by Jim amongst lax security, the traitor meeting a fate far more merciful that the traditional one at Tyburn but denied a melancholy, vodka-soaked exile. And Smiley is left master of all he surveys, his words conveying absolute authority as he explains he’s been “asked to look after things for a while.” But this is nicely undercut when we meet Ann, played by the splendid Sian Phillips, who is openly having relationships and living free and apart, treating George as an innocent friend to be patronised. And that’s Smiley; man of the world and yet not so, a fascinating character, one very much worthy of the great Alec Guinness.

Monday 23 September 2019

Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy: Smiley Sets a Trap

"Ever bought a fake picture, Toby?"

We get closer to unmasking Gerald in a slowly gripping final episode, but we begin with a rather odd character, Jerry, player with delightful eccentricity by the legendary Joss Ackland. Yet Jerry speaks in a bizarre “Red Indian” argot of “braves” and things that are “heap big”, a retro type of casual racism from a very different age. This, like the BP petroleum station, reminds us that this was made fiery years ago and makes me, a young man of forty-two, to feel not perhaps in the very first flush of youth.

Jerry, while admittedly confessing to some xenophobia owing to Toby Esterhase’s Hungarian origins (very much played down in this adaptation) Jerry drips more suspicion on Esterhase, who forced him to sit on suspicious information of Soviet troop movements on the Czech-Austrian border just after Prideaux (who seems to have gone AWOL) was caught.  So Toby is lured to George’s lair and, in a series of gripping scenes where Alec Guinness demonstrates the art of acting at its finest, interrogated and turned, a pawn who knows not what lies behind the suspicious largesse of Witchcraft. With Esterhase an innocent dupe, the suspects reduce to three...

I like this. I like it a lot- and I saw an article in the Guardian about a week ago that praised Tinker Tailor to the skies. So far I’m finding it very good, indeed excellent, but not quite first class, in spite of the performances. Yes, there’s a certain subtext of national decline and doing the right thing in spite of that, without reward- yet I can’t help feeling that the slow pace and silences, while unquestionably a good thing, flatter the series somewhat by allowing the viewer to fill in the subtext.

Still, Smiley is setting a trap for Gerald; let’s see how it ends...

Saturday 21 September 2019

Cockneys vs. Zombies (2012)

"I've got tits, you tit..."

Why oh why oh why have I not seen seen this film until tonight, a bloody magnificent triumph that's a cross between... well, like it says over there on the left. But the feel reminds me just as much as Severance, and you can certainly see James Moran's influence in the script.

This is a deliciously plotted and made film, with splendid zombie set pieces, and the decision to make it in large part a riff on gangster movies is an obvious thing to do. But to set so much of it in an old folks' home, with the hero and star being Alan Ford, is inspired. The zombies vs. zimmer frame chase with Richard Briers alone makes the film worth seeing. Then we get Zoe Slater from EastEnders with a series of massive guns and swords, West Ham supporting zombies fighting Millwall supporting zombies, and the bloody London bus. Oh, and that final speech. This is a film that knows and bloody well skewers its zombie cliches.

Not only is it as funny as Shaun of the Dead and, at heart, full of likeable if rogueish characters, but the zombie set pieces look just as good too and the cast, with a last hurrah from so many British acting stalwarts of an earlier generation, is wonderful. I should have seen this film years ago and learned to embrace the awful title. I love Cockneys vs. Zombies.

Wednesday 18 September 2019

Batman and Robin: Episodes 8 and 9

Episode Eight: Robin Meets the Wizard

“Don’t mind her. She’s always going around taking pictures nobody sees.”

Here we go again into sixteen minutes of peril and perfunctory plotting, beginning with an outrageous cheat as Batman and Harrison dodge the bomb by using a trap door to a cellar that wasn’t there last episode. But that’s part of the charm, as is the outrageous sexism directed at the only female cast member Vicki, as per the quote.

The plot engines start up again as the Wizard demands a ransom of $5 million, quite a lot in 1949, which is foiled by a ridiculous plan from silly old Batman involving painting old notes with radium for tracking purposes (it’s the early atomic age; radium is cool) and making them flammable when exposed to the air, which will in no way go disastrously wrong.

All this plays out predictably, with an interesting set piece involving Batman quickly jumping out of the boot of a car before it heads off a cliff, and the Wizard only manages to “meet” Robin by knocking him out by throwing a stick at him- and completely failing to either kill or capture him, because we have seven episodes to go and that wouldn’t do.

Oh, look. That flammable money has Batman in trouble. Who’d have thunk it?



Episode Nine: The Wizard Strikes Back

“Batman and Robin have got to follow ”’

We get the cliffhanger resolution out of the way and then have a scene with Barry Brown and Dunn the private detective acting like red herrings, and Batman tells us both of them are suspects for being the Wizard, even though we know damn well it’s the Professor.

And... that’s it. We’re out of plot. Fortunately, though, the Wizard’s machine breaks down and needs more diamonds, which will hopefully generate enough plot and set pieces to fill another eight episodes.

We then recycle another plot thread as Vicki’s brother Jimmy pretends to be a goodie again while really working for the Wizard. Of course, no one suspects him and the only purpose he seems to serve is to tell the Wizard where the diamonds are being moved to- even though it’s him who causes them to be moved in the first place. 

Fortunately, though, we can then forget about the plot for a bit as the diamonds are nicked and there’s an exciting chase scene. The Wizard’s device seems to be suddenly working again, though, even without the diamonds being back at his base yet, and Batman’s car heads down yet another cliff. Sigh.

Tuesday 17 September 2019

Batman and Robin: Episodes 6 and 7

Episode 6: Target Robin

“This is Barry Brown, with some new hot tips and cold facts!”

It’s weird to return to this once more, a series of Boy’s Own set pieces with any attempt at humour, irony or characterisation verboten. It’s just capture, escape, inconclusive set piece after inconclusive set piece and, while it’s all very entertaining and carries you along, it’s clear that the plot makes no sense and simply cannot do so in this format. Barman and Robin are simply reacting to events with no real detective work at all; how many times have they discussed Barry Brown as a suspect and failed to do anything?

We begin with an outrageously perfunctory cliffhanger resolution and a captured hood. It’s about time for the token female to appear so here’s Vicki Vale- But Batman, bring male and thus in charge, forbids her from taking a photo for some reason. He then dons a suspiciously accurate disguise as the captured Hood and proves how stupid the other hoods are as they fail to notice that “Mac” is a deeply unconvincing actor- although that may be entirely non-diegetic as Robert Lowery is pretty dire.but soon, after some chaotic scenes, Robin escapes with Bruce- so the Wizard fires Nolan and Evans for incompetence, because that’s what super villains do.

The plot resumes its circular way and Barry Brown reveals another crime location and another cliffhanger trap, this time with gas. This is utterly perfunctory stuff.



Episode 7: The Fatal Blast

“You know, if I didn’t know Bruce Wayne so well, I’d think you and he were the same man.”

So Batman has weird gas masks and an acetylene torch in his person- was the utility belt a thing in 1949? We soon move on to a scene of Barry Brown visiting Commissioner Gordon and spending the entire scene behaving like a red herring, which he obviously is; we know the Professor is the Wizard as it’s all but shown yet again here.

The Wizard’s new wheeze is to extort money by using his remote control machine to stop all trains going through Gotham Station- and the only train the budget stretches to is a steam one, which is pretty damn cool. The Wizard is a twonk, though, insisting that he never makes mistakes (ahem!) and he won’t tolerate it from his underlings.

We get a scene with Vicki Vale (the only female character since, well, she last appeared) that leaves me utterly agog. She’s following Batman and Robin until they stop her and “confiscate” her key, so she can’t follow them and do her job, and the subtext here is that she’s a woman and thus a child who needs to be prevented by male authority from doing man’s work. Wow. Yes, she outwits Batman But in the style of a rebellious naughty child. Not only that, but she notices Batman is driving Bruce’s car. That’s a staggering piece of carelessness from this uniquely thick Batman.

Still, the plot must go on, and it’s nearly cliffhanger time. So Batman rescues rail tycoon Harrison and they both go to a cabin for some reason. And a bomb blows up. Of course it does.

Monday 9 September 2019

Stranger Things: Season 3, Chapter Eight: The Battle of Starcourt Mall

“Dusty-bun!”

Here it is, then: not only the season finale but the last episode so far, bringing Mrs Llamastrangler and myself fully up to date meaning we’ll have to find something else to do with our evenings once we’ve finished adulting. Gulp.

We begin with Joyce and Hopper finally reaching the food court and joining the rest of the gang so they can all work out how they’re going to save the world this time. The first order of business, between a capable Jonathan and El herself, is to remove that nasty infection from that would- and it is indeed a nasty baby Mind Flayer. Eeeeuuurgh.

But then comes the plan, and fortunately Murray has a map. This time he, Joyce and Hopper are to close the portal, Dustin and his gang for most of the season are in charge of radio commercials, and everyone else has the vital task of being peril monkeys. Sorted.

Interesting that the Russians remain baddies throughout, but I’m not sure I but that, given the fact they don’t want the Mind Flayer to destroy everything- they want the world to be red, not dead- that they remain antagonists all the way through. Isn’t that nice young Mr Gorbachev someone we can do business with?

The plot proceeds as Hopper and co amusingly smile and nod their way towards the portal and the kids get well and truly imperilled by the Mind Flayer in a truly massive and highly entertaining set piece.  There’s also a nice scene where Billy sabotages their cat and tries to ram them, but ultimately this is just a cool distraction, although Jonathan again shows himself to be very capable at the sort of car stuff that is most certainly a great mystery to me.

It’s cute that the way into the room with the portal requires Planck’s constant, and we get this from none other than Dusty-bun’s very own Suzie-poos, although it is of course necessary to do a duet of the entire theme tune of The Never-Ending Story first, as waded figure in the ‘80s. I mean, yes, the Mind Flayer is getting bigger, El’s powers seem to be MIA and the fireworks are running out, but standards are standards.

But the closing of the portal requires Hopper to win an epic fight with the evil Comrade Motorbike, and Joyce can only close the portal by letting him die. That last nod between them as she presses the buttons is heartbreaking. As is the fact that Joyce lost a boyfriend last season and now is losing another one before they ever got to have that date. Duffer Brothers, you are bastards, every bit as evil as Joss Whedon.

Oh, and Billy dies too. It’s nice that Max is genuinely devastated in spite of everything.

Joyce runs out to Will and hugs him.. and El has no father to hug. It’s utterly tear jerking and no wonder, three mo this later that Joyce, Jonathan, a newly nature Will and the still powerless but kindly adopted El are leaving, with some meaningful partings, especially Nancy and Jonathan, now truly in love, and while Mike can’t get the words out to El she is able to say “I love you too”. Aww! And do t even mention that last voiceover from Hopper, that speech to her he never really gave, except that it’s bloody clever plotting.

But what’s this after the titles have finished? A gulag in the Kamchatka Peninsula? A myseterious American Prisoner? Inmates fed to...a Demogorgon?

Utterly sublime. So much so that I’m running out of words to praise it. And no fourth season until 2021...? Real time sucks.

Stranger Things: Season 3, Chapter Seven- The Bite

“We all die, my strange little child friend.”

The penultimate episode begins with, well, rather cheery scenes of a Fourth of July funfair via Karen and her family seeing some possibly CGI fireworks from the top of the Ferris wheel. Only their little girl commenting on the trees moving (I’m sure the reference to Ents is deliberate) suggest that there is anything amiss, but amiss things certainly are, as Eleven is at a low ebb after her recent encounter with “Billy”- and a massive Mind Flayer is suddenly after them. They certainly seem to be in a bit of a pickle, as the big set piece with the Mind Flayer sending it’s pointy teethed tentacles through the windows is utterly bloody terrifying, and while El manages to beat it back so they can all drive off she is wounded.

Meanwhile Dustin, Erica, and a still somewhat stoned Robin and Steve manage to escape to the cinema, which has a brand new film playing- Back to the Future, which is quite rightly dwelt upon somewhat. I love Robin and Steve’s stoned conversation about the timey-wimeyness.

Meanwhile, Murray continues to be most perceptive about Joyce and Hopper just needing to get a bloody room, and his exchange with Alexei on the subject is bloody hilarious. Also amusing is that Lucas’ idea for a weapon against the baddie- fireworks- is again pooh poohed, although we know his ideas always seem to work. I note his catapult saves the gang from the Mind Flayer, too, in the ensuing set piece in the foyer. I also like how Mike is saved from having to tell El that he loves her by Dustin’s “code red”...

There’s a poignant scene, though, in the toilet(!), Where Dustin explains his feelings for Robin, only for her to unexpectedly and gently explain that her preferences are for another gender- and Steve proceeds to not be a dick about it and make very clear that he just wants to be good friends. A potential romance is derailed, but both characters are rather lovely here.

There’s an amusing scene with Joyce and Hopper in the Graviton (Do they still have that in Alton Towers? I haven’t been on one since about ‘93), but this is juxtaposed with Alexei, just when he’s had a bit of fun, being shot by his motorbiking fellow Russian. Murray is devastated; we’ve seen this odd friendship developing and Murray is now fully on board with the mission.

There’s a splendid set piece between Hopper and Motorbike Comrade in the hall of mirrors, and Dustin and co finally reunite with the other kids- with Lucas amazed to see Erica. But El collapses with what I’m sure is not a normal infected wound, and we have only an Uber-long finale to go.

Obviously, this is awesome. Saying that almost seems superfluous.

Sunday 8 September 2019

The Goonies (1985)

"Nothing exciting ever happens here anyway..."

I was eight in 1985. And this is the first time I've ever seen this film. Yes, I know.

So, what’s it like, seeing this for the first time at the age of forty-two? Well, I rather enjoyed it, and not least because of the bizarreness of seeing Sam from Lord of the Rings and Thanos as brothers. It’s a pirate themed adventure story-cum-comedy, complete with comedy criminal baddies, scripted but not shot by Steven Spielberg and seemingly intended as very much Indiana Jones (a hot property in 1985) for kids- even to the point of casting Ke Huy Quan.

There are lots of booby traps, Heath Robinson style escapades and silly gadgets, mostly from Data, and even the opening of the gate early on is the coolest thing ever. It’s essentially for kids and I’m really probably too old to appreciate it, but there’s also a little bit of subtle romance wiry the teenage Josh Brolin and a splendid comeuppance for some evil property developers.

Maybe there’s an uncomfortable focus on Chunk’s Jewishness but, then again, the part is both written and played by a Jewish person. And the character of Sloth is probably not one we’d see these days.But this is a pretty much faultless ‘80s classic that I really, really should have seen back in the day when I used to constantly see the poster reproduced here in the pages of the UK reprint of Secret Wars II. Lessons learned, I think, and better thirty-four years late than never...

Stranger Things: Season 3, Chapter Six- E Pluribus Unum

“You remind him of a fat Rambo...”

Dustin and co see the big Russian lab, they see the portal into the Upside Down... and things get chaotic. They run. Meanwhile, in the hospital, the monster, which looks absolutely bloody terrifying, is after Nancy and Jonathan. It's not exactly a relaxed beginning, and the monster really does look awesome, and clearly not all CGI.

The resolution is, of course, Eleven shoving it forcibly out of the window, from whence it oozes under the ground, returning to its home. More bad stuff ensues with the Mayor, who is completely under the control of the big boss Russian man, and with the Fourth of July going on and stuff, the anniversary of the Americans' independence from, er, us.

The scenes where Hopper, Joyce and Conspiracy Theorist Bloke interrogate Russian Alexis with brinkmanship threats of giving him the wrong flavour of drink from Burger King, a torture method almost as notorious as the comfy chair, are comedy gold. But these methods get results, and Joyce and Jim hear of the Russian attempt to open a portal to the Upside Down, right there in Indiana, beneath their feet, with the finest Soviet scientists in an impregnable fortress impossible to breach, guarded by the mightiest Soviet warriors. Getting in is simply impossible.

Meanwhile, having got in, unarmed kids Dustin and the splendid Erica are comparing notes. Erica now knows everything- and, wonderfully, her only note of scepticism is that her nerdy brother Lucas was part of it. Meanwhile, Steve and Robin are being interrogated by non-comfy chair methods, not a pleasant experience, especially when one’s interrogators won’t believe the truth. But at least there is a blatant connection between them being developed and it’s blatant that they will end up together. And Robin is really, really cool.

The kids, meanwhile, are progressing the main plot strand and, rather cutely, Mike accidentally blurts out to his friends that he loves El. Aaaw. El has the dangerous mission to psychically locate the Mind Flayer’s HQ via Billy, which she does, but not without a horrific tour of Bully’s abusive childhood; I hope his dad suffers an unpleasant death, I suppose, but sadly he represents a real life horror not hiding behind metaphor, rather than the fantastic.

Except.. it was all a trap. Billy’s final speech is chilling. The Mind Flayer now has El where it wants her and can see through her- and it plans to kill everyone...

Yep. That was bloody excellent, as per usual.

Saturday 7 September 2019

Stranger Things: Season 3, Chapter Five- The Flayed

“Can you redirect your stream please?”

We rejoin with the lift going down, down, down, until it stops and, er, Steve falls on his groin. They’re trapped, but Erica is super cool as ever. I’d say already that she’s passed the audition as they all stay relatively calm for quite a while in spite of bladder issues. Meanwhile Joyce and Hopper search the house of the motorbike man, and after hearing Russian voices they soon end up with two Soviet captives- until the big boss arrives (the subtitles call him Grigory but I do t think we’re supposed to know that) and a big set piece fight begins. Ultimately Hopper and Joyce escape with one of the Russians, but they are clearly being pursued.

There’s still time for some ‘80s flavour, though, and so it’s good to see a poster for R.E.M.’s “Murmur” on Jonathan’s wall, keeping him in our eyes as someone with unremittingly good musical taste, a character trait recently neglected. Personally I find the production alienating as it sounds completely unlike what the band would become, in spite of a strong set of tunes.

Anyway, Jonathan gets a 6am call from an alarmed Nancy at the hospital, urgently needing to speak to Will after what she's seen- the Mind Flayer is back. This leads to the pair of them joining the kids, a pivotal plot moment, just as Millie is using her powers to find Hopper and Joyce in the woods with said Russian, trying to get to Hopper’s acquaintance in Illinois.

Meanwhile, underground, with bladders straining, clever Steve gets everyone out of the lift and into... a long, empty corridor. Yes, this scene is pretty much padding until they get to the lab but that’s ok because the interaction of the characters is splendid, especially Dustin telling Erica, with the authority of My Little Pony, that shes a nerd too. Ouch.

While this is going on, Nancy and Jonathan Deal stories with the kids, bringing their respective strands together, working out that, if Heather has been turned, Tom must have been too, so it’s off to the family home and the scene of the crime. Meanwhile Hopper and Joyce, amusingly, are saved by Alexie who finds that grand American institution, the 7 Eleven, which I don’t believe I visited on any of my four visits to the country, a curious omission. Here unfold various amusing scenes of fast food consumption and car theft in what is certainly becoming the plot thread with the most comic relief.

More progress is made by Dustin and co, working out that the mall must exist as cover for what lies underneath. This, of course, brings up the awkwardness that Robin and Erica don’t know the weird stuff that’s happened. The kids make progress too, though, working out that the Mind Flayer must have a base of operations somewhere, that Mrs D wants to get there, so why not go to the hospital and use her as bait? What could possibly go catastrophically, cliffhangeringly wrong?

Then we have the highlight of the episode, as Hopper’s friend in Illinois is the conspiracy theorist from last season, who happens to speak Russian, a good excuse to have him back- and he’s immediately perceptive about the relationship between Joyce and Hopper. But more is discovered by Dustin and co who finally emerge into the lab.... which clearly centres on a massive portal into the Upside Down, as alluded to at the start of the first time and explaining a lot. There’s also interesting scenes in the hospital as Nancy and Jonathan make up, him cheerfully admitting he’s wrong, and there is much weirdness with American chocolate bars. Their Kit Kats look bizarre. Their Marathons were called Snickers even in 1985. Does not compute.

Almost, but not quite, as horrifying is that Tom and his odious mate are waiting, having been got at by the Mind Flayer, and the ensuing scenes of them trying to get Nancy are pure horror. But not as horrifying as what happens next as both baddies dissolve into an ooze which re-forms into a terrifying and very well-realised monster. Oh dear.

Yeah. That was very good.

Friday 6 September 2019

Stranger Things: Season 3, Chapter Four- The Sauna Test

”Commence Operation Child Endangerment!”

Another splendid episode of investigation, but also one of progress this time, plus some nice little character touches; Max is a regular reader of Wonder Woman! I’m afraid my knowledge of the ‘80s scene is very, very Marvel with my knowledge of the Disgruntled Competition focused mainly on Batman, John Byrne’s Superman, Justice League International and the usual stuff by Alan Moore and Neil Gaiman- was Wonder Woman any good in 1985?

Anyway, editor Tom and his wife have been well and truly got at by Billy- and that horrible beast underground whom everyone seems to be sacrificed to, a kind of miniature Mind Flayer, seems to such up their faces which... well, uuurgh.

Tom is visibly sweating while bollocking Nancy and Jonathan for their unauthorised investigations, with Mrs Driscoll in hospital and an awful lot of trouble, but seems pretty much himself as he sacks the pair of them. Both of them are devastated and have a bit of a row, which is revealing; Nancy did it because she was fed up of being treated as a young woman in a man’s world, understandably. It went beyond being young and working your way up; this was real, nasty, misogyny. Then again, she comes from a well off family and can afford this setback. Jonathan doesn’t, and can’t.

One consequence, though, is a lovely scene between her and her mother, Karen. In the first season there were many scenes of Karen helplessly failing to connect with her daughter but they really bond over this, and Karen is fantastic, urging her not to give up.

Will knows that the Mind Flayer is back, which means the party- Max and El included- are back together, minus the otherwise occupied Dustin, in spite of the awkwardness meaning that even Mine explaining what happened with Hopper just looks desperate and butters not a single parsnip.

We get an interesting scene where Joyce and Hopper investigate the dodgy Mayor- that bloke on the motorbike was there the last time they visited Town Hall, and it seems he was handing a bribe to the Mayor- a bribe for getting people to sell land next to the land for the mall to expand there- a possible source of the magnetic weirdness? This goes well, so much so that Hopper offers Joyce a police job, which would be perfect for a detective like her.

Even more brilliant, super sleuth Robin manages to get plans to the Russians’ warehouse, and cones up with the idea to use, as is traditional, air vents to reach the inner sanctum. Cue the utterly superb Erica who wangles herself a lifetime of free ice cream for doing the crawling. Erica is awesome. An equally cool idea is for the gang to test Billy for Mind Flayer influence by shoving him in a sauna, a brilliantly executed scene.

We end with trouble, though. Robin, Steve, Erica and Dustin arrive in the inner sanctum, see some mysterious glowing green object, but end up travelling down several floors as the room turns out to be a lift. And the gang’s confrontation with Billy turns out to be a tad dramatic, although at least it ends up revealing how much El and Mike are willing to do for each other. Once again, a splendid marriage of character and plot structure in what is a slow building but clever season based, unusually, more on intrigue than scares.

The final scenes see an investigating Nancy present as Mrs Driscoll is about to e pride, while Billy has turned dozens of people via that underground monster and, surreally, they all start creepily channelling Dame Vera Lynn...

Thursday 5 September 2019

Stranger Things: Season 3, Chapter Three- The Case of the Missing Lifeguard

“What is happy screams...?”

We begin with a reminder of what decade it is as El and Max perv over, er, Ralph Macchio. But we then move to an interesting little episode of various parallel bits of detective work. It’s also an interesting episode for character- after discussing the Mike situation with Max, El uses her powers to spy on the boys(!) and heats lots of outrageous sexism and, fortunately for the requirements of the plot, no mention of the fact that this is all Hopper’s fault. Yet. This is the episode where Hopper is pretty smug, something which I suspect won’t last. I’ve noticed this season he’s been more of a comedy character, though, not written so three dimensionally. I hope that doesn’t last.

But we then turn to Billy, and doing the same thing with him weirdness... and him doing something dodgy to a girl. Meanwhile Steve, Dustin and Robin... well, just Robin- translate the Russian message and decide what it means- there’s some kind of exciting Cold War spycraft going on at the mall- and yes, I’ll get back to Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy very soon! Joyce is investigating the magnets, dates with Hopper be damned. Finally we have Nancy and Jonathan pushing the rat story, although the sexist men running the paper are still sexist dicks.

This may be an obvious plot structure but it allows things to move forward while the characters can breathe. We have Dustin and Steve having, well, the most childish chat ever, while Will is genuinely upset at his friends for letting the party split apart and obsessing over girls rather than play D&D with him. I’m not sure about the implication that D&D is for kids- I’m a husband and father who works full time and while, yes, it’s a time consuming hobby, I played it as recently as earlier this year. And I’m 42. But the broader character point Rings very true; puberty and change can test friendships.

Joyce and Hopper also find some dodgy motorcyclist frequenting the dirty lab, which Joyce suspects to be the source of the magnetic weirdness, another plot thread, while Mrs Driscoll is suddenly behaving like a rat. And there we have Billy, and the girl he attacked, recruiting her parents to their creepy little cult- one of whom is the editor of the local paper.

It’s all largely set-up three episodes in, with more mystery than threat, but the characters, azevwr, keep us hooked.


Stranger Things: Season 3, Chapter Two: The Mall Rats

“I dump your ass!”

I know this is completely irrelevant, but Little Miss Llamastrangler has just gone in for her first day of school today. I’m somewhat distracted by that, but I will do my best!

The cliffhanger resolution with something getting Billy is extended, rather terrifying, and shot like a horror movie- something which doesn't often happen on television drama but which happens here, something I’ve alluded to before but never really focussed on. It’s a fresh and exciting idea to have a serialised television drama, with room for characters to grow and develop, which nevertheless follows the directorial style and visual style of horror, as well as it’s many tropes. That Stranger Things does this, and does it so well, is especially to its credit given the generally poor standard of contemporary horror movies.

This is a clever episode, and not least because of the pun within the title. Less clever is Hopper, not doing as Joyce suggested and calmly discussing boundaries with El and Mike but instead aggressively making Mike tell El he can’t see her. That’ll go well.

Lots of seeds are being down for the season- magnets don’t seem to be working (would this noticeably affect electronics in 1985?) and Joyce is becoming obsessed. Old Mrs Driscoll has a very rabid rat in her capacious American basement which Nancy and Jonathan are secretly investigating for a story. And Steve and Dustin, good mates by now, are trying to decipher the Russian messages- and getting nowhere until the rather brilliant Robin takes over. I like her. She’s cool.

It’s lovely seeing Eleven and Max as friends, getting to do girly things together. And one thing that brings them together, leading to a rather fun day in the mall, is Mike’s rather obvious lying about how he can’t see her.

Meanwhile, Billy is now struggling as a lifeguard as he no longer likes the Sun- quite the warning sign. And we, through Hopper, meet the odious and cynical Mayor Kline, who is probably the big bad as he’s played by Cary Elwes. There’s a nice mix of plot and character as Joyce blows off a definitely-not-a-date with Hopper through her obsession with the magnets, and we get to see the rabid rat explode- and then ooze away, moving like a spider. Uuurgh.

We finally get the moment where El dumps Mike and, brilliantly, Will punctures the moment by asking if the boys can play D&D now. But we end with the revelation that the Russian message came from within the mall, and that Billy has now caught and possibly killed a fellow lifeguard...

Wednesday 4 September 2019

Stranger Things: Season 3, Chapter One- Suzie, Do You Copy?

“Maybe I could kill Mike. I’m the chief of police. I could cover it up!”

So, it’s a brand new season, it’s June 1985- only six months later- and all the younger members of the cast look visibly older; in fact, the boys’ voices have mostly broke. I’m not sure how diegetic that is, but the whole season feels very different- not least because the first scene is in the “good” ol’ USSR where Comrade General is not best pleased at the failure to open a portal to the Upside Down and the scientists of the Revolution must do better.

Back in Hawkins, though, life is moving on. Hopper has a massive new moustache, for one thing, and a big deal is made about a big new Eighties shopping mall just outside of town which is no doubt going to be central to the plot, especially as the film being shown is Day of the Dead. Eleven and Mike have spent about 90% of the last six months kissing, which is adorable, although Hopper doesn’t quite seem to agree. Meanwhile Max and Lucas are an established couple, and the party is not quite what it was. Dustin returns from summer camp (that old American tradition) to a practical joke from his mates involving his toys seeming to attack him- including the Transformer Ultra Magnus which wasn’t released until 1986, but let us not be churlish. And even he has a girlfriend, apparently, in Utah, and a massive radio mast to contact her as her strict Mormon parents won’t let her phone.

Except.. when he shows everyone she doesn’t respond, the excluded and single Will just wants to play D&D like the old days, and they all drift off.. cue something Russian in the ether that is obviously plot-related.

Steve, suddenly no longer a ladies’ man, works at an ice cream place with the delightfully cynical Robin, and by now is both rather likeable and absolutely “the babysitter”. Meanwhile Joyce is  not quite over the death of Bob, unsurprisingly (I love the pic of him as superhero). We also see Nancy in her job as dogsbody at the local paper, constantly talked down to be a load of sexist men who have no idea what awaits their profession over the coming decades.

But most importantly there is a power cut followed by the arrival of... something. And, after amusing scenes of all the local middle aged ladies perving on Billy as he does his job as a lifeguard, we end the episode with said thing getting him. A very promising start indeed....

Stranger Things: Season 2, Chapter Nine- The Gate

“I’m just curious, you know, why all of a sudden you look like some kind of an MTV punk.”

So, another finale. It really doesn’t feel long at all she nice the last one but for me, well, it really isn’t. Mrs Llamastrangler and I have really been mainlining Stranger Things intravenously, the pure stuff, for the last week and a bit. Soon there will be no more left, and we won’t see our dealer again until next year. Ouch.

We begin by dealing with Eleven’s dramatic return. The truth soon comes out and, well, I think I can say without fear of exaggeration that Mike is not entirely happy with Hopper. But there’s no time to dwell on this as it’s the finale, and so we move swiftly to scenes of, er, Billy flirting outrageously with Mike’s mum, like the slut he is, for information. He’s coming. Yes, he’s coming. But he’s not exactly the biggest threat the gang has to worry about right now, as plans are laid for Eleven to go and close the portal with her awesome powers- but will this kill Will? Joyce and others decide to force the thing out of him by making the environment too hot for it, which seems a bit Seat of the pants; only the rules of dramatic narrative, with this being the finale, make us suspect that the plan will work.

There’s room for quiet character moments, though; Nancy and Steve have a chat in which he gently lets her go, with dignity. For a character who started out as a bit of a dick he’s gradually becoming a likeable and somewhat cool member of the cast. Also, Eleven nearly kisses Mike, but there’s a lovely scene between her and Hopper as they share their honest feelings and make up- he even tells her about Sarah for the first time. It’s a lovely scene and it’s clear that, behind the sometimes authoritarianism born of cluelessness, he would do anything for her.

Billy turns up and gives poor Steve a good kicking but, in a nice touch, it’s Max who beats him by injecting him with the tranquillisers previously used for Billy. So there’s one threat dealt with. Eleven’s turn now, and it’s a dramatic sequence of events as she slowly closes the portal, Hopper defending her from constant attack- and also sparing a moment to insist to the cowering lan boss that she be given a normal life where she can be herself and not just used. All this is juxtaposed with equally dramatic scenes of Will’s, well, exorcism, all brilliantly shot like a horror movie.

So, the monsters are dead- for now- and it’s Christmas again, a month later. Eleven has a fake birth certificate (“Jane Hopper”!) and there’s one of those balls that American schools seem to always be having. Lucas dances with Max, Mike and Jane finally kiss... but poor Dustin is left alone with only a kindly and very lovely Nancy to comfort him.

And, in the last scene, we see the Mind Flayer is still there...

A superb season, obviously, but a very different one- a season that knows it isn’t the only one, where it has the freedom for characters to breathe and develop. I love Stranger Things.

Tuesday 3 September 2019

Terrance Dicks

I only met Terrance Dicks, who has recently died aged 84, twice. One was the usual sort of thing when asking for an autograph, but the other occasion was special. It was while Nick and I were at the splendid Whooverville convention in 2015 in the capacity of the now-on-hiatus-because-of-real-life DictorcWho podcast. It was at the end of the day and all the podcasters, rather brilliantly, were given the chance to interview most of the convention guests in a whirl of speed dating. We must have spent no more than five minutes with Terrance, but they were five extraordinary minutes with Terrance on form and electrifying after, possibly, just a few pints other than the one he happened to be drinking. He was cheerfully honest and gave a great interview, happily opining on how the state of Doctor Who, when he arrived in 1968, was ominous, with a desperate shortage of scripts, because the production team were “a bunch of drunks”.

This was said entirely without malice, of course, but with a sense of conspiratorial, conversational ease that made me wish I’d been able to speak with him more than just that once, shamelessly hogging the interview without Nick being able to get a word in sideways. He was so generous, friendly and open with two people he’d only just met.

And he was, of course, a legend, the driving force behind Doctor Who between 1968 and 1974 and a huge influence thereafter. Every head writer on Doctor Who since 1974 has been hugely influenced by him for the simple reason that it’s impossible not to be. His scripts were amongst the very best- The War Games, The Brain of Morbius, State of Decay- but more than that is his wider legacy of shaping what Doctor Who was in his six years as head writer. He didn’t create the programme; indeed, it had glorious tones before him. But the Doctor as the hero we know, “never cruel nor cowardly”, will always define the character. The Doctor may change, but I think we all accepted Terrance as the ultimate arbiter of what was and was not “Doctorish”.

And that’s without even mentioning the Target novelisations, Timewyrm: Exodus or the many other things he achieved. Terrance, you’ll be missed.

Stranger Things: Season 2, Chapter Eight- The Mind Flayer

”Like the Mind Flayer...”

This is an exciting, action packed, penultimate episode full of thrills, anticipation and edge of one’s seat action. It is also, paradoxically, an episode in which, by Stranger Things’ standards, relatively little happens.

The cliffhanger to Episode Six is resolved pretty damn terrifyingly as hordes upon hordes of Demo-dogs emerge and the whole lab is evacuated- and the stragglers are, well, eaten. And then the electricity goes An the place is in complete darkness. Things are not looking good.

Meanwhile a struggling Will is sedated so the Mind Flayer can be safely kept in ignorance, and we see Billy using a disgraceful amount of hairspray for his mullet, which was sadly legal back then. We also see Billy’s abusive twat of a dad, and how cowed and uncomfortable Max’s poor mum is. Billy is just an example of the cycle of abuse, depressingly manifesting itself once again.  But Billy is sent looking for Max, the slightly less terrifying of this episode’s two main threats. Also, he has a poster of “Kill ‘Em All” which is the only ‘80s Metallica album I just don’t get.

There’s an inevitable row between Dustin and Lucas over the revelation that Dustin kept Dart, but this episode is pretty much streamlined around the escape from the lab, and in particular about the unexpected heroics from Bob- decent man, nerd who gets the girl, massive piece of misdirection after all that talk of moving to Maine, after we have all that suspense about him getting to safety with a Demo-dog trying to get him- and then safety not being so safe as a completely different Demo-dog gets him and kills him anyway. It’s a truly shocking and well executed moment, brilliantly shot to shock and tastefully dwelt upon. Bob will be missed and remembered, and not only because he’s the only non-redshirt to die this season so far.

The episode concludes with everyone in dire straits, desperately trying to think of ways to kill the Mind Flayer (and it does indeed behave like said D&D monster), as everyone slowly uses memories to bring Will back to himself. But slowly the Mind Flayer reasserts control and the house is surrounded. There’s no hope. They’re all going to die and all is lost. It’s all brilliantly built up.

And... oh, there’s Eleven.

Monday 2 September 2019

Stranger Things: Season 2, Chapter Seven- The Lost Sister

“You hurt the bad men?”

I’m told this episode is controversial. Well, not only did I enjoy it as a change of pace but I found it a hugely encouraging step. I’ve said earlier in the season that this second series appears to have a less linear plot that the first, and to spend more time developing the characters, freed to do so by not being structured like a thriller. This episode is a splendid exemplar of this difference; the first season was a one off story with no particular expectation of a second season. An episode like this, taking time to develop one character, is a sign of a series with an eye on its long term future. This episode announces that Stranger Things is planning to stay around, at least for a while.

It is, of course, pivotal to the season. It’s not just about Eleven/Jane realising she’s not alone and meeting her “sister” Kali, pitting some context to her life and learning a few lessons along the way. No; it’s about her realising, after spending most of the season apart from the plot, that her place is to return to her friends and save them. In fact, the existence of this episode makes it pretty much certain that she’s going to save the day but also, by making sure that moment is earned, saves it from being a deus ex machina.

It’s nice to see a gritty, urban episode set in Chicago, with us following a group of outcasts for an episode who, in spite of only Kali and Jane having powers, feel very much like the X-Men of the Eighties somehow, reminding me of the feel of the last few years of Chris Claremont’s run. Jane also gets a cool goth look, given to her by her new outcast friends, which very well may be a reference to the music video to “Strange Little Girl” by the Stranglers; have a look at one of those pronouny and tubular places online.

Jane ultimately learns a lesson about the futility of revenge, one as old as Aeschylus and the Oresteia;  if she and Kali kill their tormentor, would that not make his daughters one day feel justified in coming after them? Better to have justice, however flawed. As with many things, it’s best kept in the public sector.

I suspect a lot of people don’t like this because they think it’s a detour from the main plot and makes us wAit to resolve the cliffhanger. Well, it isn’t. This episode absolutely moves the season onwards and does an important structural job for both the season and the show. And this is Netflix; it’s not as though we need to wait a week to see the resolution.

No; this splendid episode is a sign that Stranger Things can be something much bigger than the small town of Hawkins, Indiana. Bring on the worldbuilding.

Stranger Things: Season 2, Chapter Six- The Spy

“So, Jonathan... How was the pull-out?”

Last episode has taken its toll; both Will and Hopper are rushed straight to hospital, or rather to medical treatment in the lab. Shades of grey there may of course be, but functionally and very conveniently the scientists are goodies this time round.

Meanwhile Dustin and the increasingly likeable Steve, while hunting for Dart (Dustin has found no one else to be available!), have found the little darling to have escaped and, implicitly, to have grown rather larger, having shed its skin. It escaped through a hole it made into one of those tunnels. Oops. Naughty Dustin.

Meanwhile the scientists from the lab are fully brought up to speed, effectively joining our gang of Scoobies as a resource of redshirts. And, on a totally unscientific note, our conspiracy theory friend is very perceptive about Nancy and Jonathan (“We like Steve. But we don’t love Steve.” His influence at last leafs to the end of that simmering sexual tension, which is easily as useful as helping them to get justice for Barb.

Lucas, after being so thoroughly disbelieved last time, convinced Max to come with him and see some proof, sneaking past her dodgy and racist “brother”. This is all part of getting everyone back together again as the two of them soon run into Justin and Steve. Meanwhile, the Shadow Monster seems to be taking over Will more and more as he is forgetting things and appearing like someone who has dementia, something hard to watch in one so young. Even worse is that burning the monsters, the only thing that seems to kill them, hurts Will and may eventually kill him. Quite the dilemma. Hopper theorises that the thing is an intelligent virus with a hive mind.

We hear some interesting backstory from Max- her mum left her dad and she is now forced to love to Indiana with her mum, stepdad and dodgy stepbrother rather than with her dad with whom she wants to be. She seems to connect with Lucas, rather than with poor Dustin who originally fancied her. It’s clear, I think, that poor Dustin is going to end up as the gooseberry.

We end up with Max, Lucas, Steve and Dustin trapped and surrounded by Demo-dogs (copyright Dustin) in a bus. Meanwhile, in cliffhanger number two, the controller Will sets up a trap, and monsters begin to emerge through the portal...

Sunday 1 September 2019

Stranger Things: Season 2, Chapter Five- Dig, Dug

”I’m sorry. You ate my cat.”

Lots of scares at the start as something spits at Hopper while he’s underground, in one of those little tunnels from the Upside Down. Worse, the hole he came through closes and there are doubtless lots of deadly beasties down here. He’s up a creek and it’s u certain whether anything he happens to be carrying could constitute a paddle. Fortunately Will is plugged into the baddies and is able to tell Joyce that he’s up said metaphorical creek.

There’s an entirely different awkwardness between Nancy and Jonathan, as the sexual tension has by now reached unbearable levels and they urgently need to get a room. Much cuter is the interaction between the various members of Lucas’ family. We haven’t seen much of them so far but they seem normal and relatable. I like Dustin’s family too, not least because they’re clearly rooting for Walter Mondale in the upcoming election and are thus not evil. But Dustin does have a problem with a fully grown, definitely Demogorgon Dart, who pretty certainly is evil. Dustin hunts and traps it, but the problem is what to do now.

Equally brave is Eleven, who has the guts to visit her mother and aunt and, after a little convincing, is welcomed with open arms. And her catatonic mother, through telepathic darkness, finds a way to communicate and e plain why she says the things she does, in a cycle- we see the birth, and her mother going into the lab to rescue Jane; finding her with another little girl; and deliberately having her sanity taken away. It’s a horrible, horrible fate and a deeply disturbing thing to see.

Meanwhile Nancy and Jonathan visit the private eye investigating Barb’s death, a delightfully eccentric character. I love everything about these sequences in which they show him the dice me and together, with the help of some vodka, work out just how much to water down the truth in exposing what happened and getting justice for Barb. I really love this hippie conspiracy theorist, annoying though such types are in real life, but not as much as I love that Nancy and Jonathan finally do it. Hallelujah.

Meanwhile Lucas tells Max everything and, with depressing realism, is not believed. Fortunately Bob is less sceptical as he is finally brought into things, helps work out from what Will is drawing where Hopper is and, with the help of a bunch of redshirts from the lab, eventually find Hopper so that, against the odds, he lives. Phew. But using fire on the creatures hurts Will...

Obviously, again, I can only say that this is awesome. More please. Now.

Stranger Things: Season 2, Chapter Four- Will the Wise

“They’re growing, spreading, killing...”

Joyce arrives with the boys- and they find Will catatonic, in a very bad way, but mercifully alive although the Shadow Monster has well and truly got him. It’s all a moment of high drama- but one from which Max is completely excluded as she has not a clue what is going on, a running sore.

Meanwhile, Eleven arrives home to Hopper and an almighty row, one that gets completely out of hand with Hopper going way too far into authoritarian mode. Yes, as a dad, I can see how it can happen, especially when you’re having a bad day, but this is taking a bit further than that- it’s quite a brave decision to allow a character we like to behave so unlikeable.

Of course, making Eleven angry can be a dangerous thing. She can seriously hurt you. Things don’t go quite as far as the breaking of bones we’ve seen before, but there’s a wider issue here- how can someone with such abilities, and a traumatic childhood to boot, be happily integrated into society? One can even see Eleven’s powers as a metaphor for borderline personality disorder in this context; she’s had an abusive past, has a troubled sense of self and a fear of abandonment, and lashes out in disruptive ways when she’s upset. And here she is finding that Hopper has kept records of her past, and reading them...

(Incidentally, as well as a box called “Hawkins Lab” in Hopper’s basement, there are many other boxes, including one marked “Vietnam”. Is Hopper a veteran?)

Morning, and Dustin finds Dart has grown larger. And Will is losing temperature because “he likes it cold”. Brr. Yet again the serial format and the fact we know the characters well by now allows Stranger Things to be bloody scary in a way few modern horror films are. But creepier than anything is Nancy and Jonathan waiting by the playground (Isn’t that playground a bit too 2010’s to convince? I say that with the authority of someone who was eight years old in 1985.) with everything shot to look sinister as they are surrounded by people from the lab. Ultimately they are captured but allowed to go after a bit of a chat about why the rift must remain secret lest the Reds find out... but Nancy recorded the whole thing. It’s a sequence that reminds us how superb the direction is.

And then we have Will struggling to explain to Joyce and Hopper these new “now memories” in his head, which seem not to be human ones. He communicates, ultimately, by pictures instead of words- loads of sheets of A4 which, we finally realise, connect into what looks like a maze- and Hopper makes the connection; these are vines, and may explain what’s happening to all the pumpkins.

Inevitably, Max lashes out at the boys, understandably upset at being obviously excluded from so much; it would have been unrealistic for this not to happen. But we also see her wanker brother(?) Billy tell her to stay away from Lucas in what looks awfully like racism.

So many dramatic things happen in this episode, but there are more; Eleven goes into the darkness to speak to her mother, and seems to be recognised before her mother vanished in a powerful scene. And Dustin wakes to find Dart having escaped from his cage- and finds him eating the cat, a little Demogorgon. And, if this wasn’t cliffhanger enough, Hopper goes digging under the pumpkin fields, and finds a tunnel where it’s the Upside Down...