X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

"Oh, my stars and garters!"

You know how a film gets critically acclaimed, you're aware of this, and so when you come to see said film, however good it may be, it inevitably disappoints next to the Platonic ideal of cinematic perfection you were expecting? And you know how, when everybody tells you a film is pants, you can be pleasurably surprised? I call that Howard the Duck syndrome, and it definitely applies here.

Syndrome or not, I found this film to be far from pants. It's entertaining, well-acted and deals with the characters well. Yes, Vinnie Jones is Vinnie Jones, but the use of the character of Juggernaut I found to be fine. Yes, the direction is unshowy, but it does the job. Yes, the Phoenix saga is squashed into a film that's really about a mutant "cure" that works as a semi-metaphor for those awful gay conversion therapies that are still legal in certain barbaric areas of the world. But it's an action-filled film, if a simple one, and the characters ring true, even if Wolverine inevitably dominates. Some characters die (Scott is a shock, but the cinema version was always quite dull), but we get a cool, recast Kitty Pryde; Colossus doing the good old fastball special with Wolverine; Angel with daddy issues; Rogue getting cured and, let's face it, getting banged by Bobby after the credits roll; the genuine grief when Charles Xavier dies; the post-credit scene; the Beast as a successful politician; Madrox.

All this, and we also get an early cameo from both Stan Lee and Chris Claremont. Ignore the critics; this film is much-maligned.

X-Men 2 (2003)

"Bobby, have you tried not being a mutant?"

It's rare for a sequel to outshine its predecessor; X-Men 2, helmed again by Bryan Singer (whose reputation has suffered post-Weinstein, as have many, and such behavior in this and all other industries cannot be tolerated, but let us not derail ourselves) may well have achieved it with this adaptation of God Loves, Man Kills.

As per the comics, the film gives us a well-rounded and well-written set of characters, all well-acted and many of whom, handily, have already been introduced. Good writing means that the sheer number of characters does not feel excessive, although I wonder if someone less familiar with the source material would say the same.

While Wolverine is still prominent- and hints are dropped about his origins- there is a much more equal treatment of the characters this time around. Nightcrawler is introduced, and in many ways true to form, but it's a pity that the character's sense of humour is so downplayed. Rogue is more peripheral this time, but the love triangle of Scott, Jean and Logan is very much still there.

Magneto is magnificent and, while allied with the goodies for much of the film, gets his chance to be evil for a bit near the end. Xavier is shown as reasonable and charming, and once again we forgot just how bloody terrifying his mind control powers are. Bobby Drake is well-developed, wit the pathos of his brother betraying him just after he outs himself to his parents. Pyro, of course, joins Magneto's lot. And, of course, Jean dies at the end just as she did in the comics a few issues before returning as Phoenix.

Among all the action and set pieces- I love the epic fight between Wolverine and Lady Deathstrike- there are also plenty of character moments, and the film is gripping throughout. This instalment will be hard to top.

X-Men (2000)

"Well, what would you prefer- yellow spandex?"

I've blogged so many Marvel films but, Deadpool aside, no X-Men ones. The reason is simple, of course: my film-watching life didn't start when I started doing films for this blog back in 2011, and by that point I'd already seen the first three. But I now remember very little of them and it's time to go back to what was arguably, with Blade not being seen by the general public as a superhero film, the beginning of the Marvel cinematic age we live in.

And it's good, faithfully showing both the premise and the characters from the comics  Patrick Stewart is an obvious choice for Professor X, although it's odd that he doesn't adopt an American accent, but Ian McKellen was born to play Magneto. But what really works, I think, is the decision to use Rogue and Wolverine as POV characters to justify all the exposition, odd though it is to see a very young Anna Paquin as another Southern belle so soon after marathoning True Blood.

The film keeps the plot simple and allows the characters to breathe, benefiting, I think, from the fact that Chris Claremont's run on the title set a style of almost soap opera, with characterisation a strong point. In that sense, I suppose, you can argue that the franchise is more suited to TV than film, but the richness of the characterisations cannot be other than a benefit. Wolverine and Rogue are well-sketched here, and it's noticeable that there's only time to hint at the depths of the likes of Storm or Cyclops.

It's an interesting choice for Magneto's character to have an early Holocaust flashback, evoking Schindler's List by use of monochrome, but it adds texture. And the treatment of bigotry against Mutants is designed well to evoke homophobia rather than the original Civil Rights era metaphor for racism. It's gruesomely fascinating to see Senator Kelly get his heavily CGI comeuppance, mind, and turning him into a kind of mutant evokes the creepy conclusion of Freaks. But it's a solidly constructed film, with a suitably visual finale at the Statue of Liberty and a sequel-hunting coda with Xavier and Magneto. It's a fine beginning to the franchise.

Oh, and on an actor-spotting note... the Toad is played by the same actor as Darth Maul!!!

True Blood: Thank You

"I wouldn't let you go down on me for a billion dollars!"

So we reach the final episode, and the main story between Sookie and Bill finishes predictably, with no surprises, but beautifully written and shot, as over a large proportion of screen time they come to an understanding and Sookie ends up lovingly killing him- although not, in the end, giving up her fairy powers. This leaves limited room for everyone else, yes, and some very important characters (Lafayette, Sam) are reduced to cameos, but it's the right decision.

Bill also gets to give Jessica away in a hurriedly arranged marriage to Hoyt, a beautiful extended sequence even if there is the niggling sense of an awful lot of unchallenged patriarchal assumptions going on there. Also, Eric kills Gus, and he and Pam end up as the billionaire owners of New Blood and the King and queen of vampiredom, which is nice. And Sarah ends up with a miserable but more-or-less deserved fate, pretty much as the prostitute Pam always intended her to be.

It's also nice to see Sookie advising Jason to actually sleep with Bridgette and get together with her, and the slow rekindling of the friendship between Jason and Hoyt. And it's especially lovely that Andy, who will inherit Bill's estate, agrees to perpetually rent the house to Jessica and Hoyt for a peppercorn rent.

We fast forward at the end to a few years later, and a happy community. Jason and Bridgette have children and Sookie is pregnant by a man whose face we don't see- that's the point; he isn't special. It's the perfect ending to an unexpectedly perfect final season.

True Blood: Love Is to Die

"I'm choosing the true death."

Bill is choosing to die because Sookie will never be able to move on while he's alive, as she could never quite manage to with Alcide. Hmm. Not sure I buy that either from the character or as a plausible motivation from a more diegetic point of view, but it's written well enough that you can't see the joins so I'll let it pass. Development of this takes up much of the episode.

Elsewhere Sam leaves for a new life in Chicago with Nicole and the bump, and Jessica starts to properly reconnect with Hoyt, telling him "the story of us" while Jason seems to be getting on rather well with Brigette, who's just dumped Hoyt. He's resisting the temptation to shag her, though... and this is Jason.

This is fascinating to watch, knowing as we do from our privileged position outside the text that this is the penultimate episode of True Blood ever. Big things happen, such as Bill releasing Jessica and Eric finally giving Ginger the fucking of her life after fifteen odd years of frustrated celibacy for her. But the Yakuza are after Sookie, which will provide a bit of conflict for the final episode.

But this episode, quite rightly, is fairly short on incident and long on letting all the characters be themselves for one last time. I've no idea where all the pieces will land in the finale- will Bill die? Will Sookie use that exploding ball power and lose her specialness? Will Jessica and Hout get back together? I have no idea; im sure there are some twists and turns to come. But I'm also sure the finale will be fast and furious, so it's wonderful to have a slow episode like this. Sublime, again.

True Blood: Almost Home

"Even as the cure you're still the fucking problem!"

We begin with Eric seemingly about to kill Sarah, until he unexpectedly is cured by her. Could there be hope for both of them? And eventually for Bill? Apparently not; after spending much of the episode building up to the moment, the episode ends with our friends all surrounding Sarah in her cell and Bill able to drink his cure... and, after putting everyone to so much trouble to get him cured, he refuses. Well then.

In other plot threads, Lettie Mae and Lafayette finally convince the Rev to join them in their V trip to find Tara's spirit. It seems she wants closure, and peace with her mother; it seems Lettie Mae was a good mum until she was abandoned by her abusive husband, and it's nice to see that acknowledged as a mother and her departed daughter finally reconcile. It's still shocking how little Tara is in this season, though. She's always been my favourite character.

(Incidentally, Tara's dad is played by Malcolm Goidwin, Clive from iZombie...)

Hoyt argues with his girlfriend Brigette about having kids, as Jason realises that Adilyn and Wade must be with Violet. Indeed they are, and about to be tortured to death, until they (and Jessica, and Jason, the only man who ever rejected her) are finally rescued, and Violet suddenly killed, by... Hoyt. There's a surprise. And things seem to be moving towards him and Jessica getting back together, amnesia or no amnesia. But wouldn't they just split up again for similar reasons?

Superb. As is every single episode at the moment. True Blood seems set to end on a real high.

True Blood: May Be the Last Time

"You're gonna die tonight."

Death stalks this episode. Bill is dying, obviously, but Sarah Newlin is being pursued by those who wish her dead, and hallucinating about her imminent death. And the episode begins with her sister Amber, after a change of heart about "Noomi", dying at Eric's hands after revealing that Sarah is the cure for Hep V. Gus isn't happy.

Meanwhile, Andy and Holly desperately search for their missing children, who may also soon be killed. But no; Violet has taken them to a well-equipped boudoir where they can have sex amongst crops, nipple clamps and assorted dildos. It really is awfully thoughtful of her. The two teens are, needless to say, overwhelmed.

Arlene, meanwhile, having had his blood, is having erotic dreams about sex concluding with sex on the pool table. Sarah seems safe for now as, in a nice bit of satire, Gus doesn't want to use her synthesised blood to find a cure for Hep V, but to create a product that people need to take for the rest of their lives. It's all about profit. And Eric has a 49% stake.

We get a sweet flashback from 1855; Bill is told by his dying father to marry Caroline, the girl next door whom he has never met, in order to acquire her land so his mother will not starve. Such was life. But their initial meeting is sweet, and they end up finding happiness. For a while. That's all we can hope for in this transitory life.

Sookie deals with an unhelpful cameo appearance by Ritger Hauer as Niall as Sam has a nice chat with Arlene about Nicole's ultimatum. And, rather sweetly, Keith wants to be with Arlene even though she's Hep V positive and they can't have sex. 

We and with Adilyn and Wade tied up and in danger, while Sookie and Bill make love for the first time in ages. Extraordinary, as always this season.

True Blood: Karma

"There are some woodpeckers moving into my frontal lobe..."

It's the day after the party and Alcide is still dead, the world is still a hard place and Bill has Hep V. It's quite the hangover.

The direction is superb from the start as Eric and Pam fall into the hands of the Yakuza and the mysterious "Gus". Meanwhile Lafayette and Lettie Mae go on a V trip to find Tara, Bill realises that, without a Vampire Rights Act, he has no rights to bequeath his property as he wishes- a clear reference to the injustice of a situation (true in many US states in 2014) where gay couples could not marry. Still, at least he gets to kill a symbolic homophobe.

And Violet, knowing that Jason is cheating on her with Jessica, is desperate to please him, changing her tune fast as she says that she is his and dresses up to give him a loving blow job. You feel desperately sorry for her, blunt and brutal though she is. But it isn't enough, and when Jasin goes running again to Jessica she is howling with rage and despair. It's over.

Gus has an interesting chat with Eric and Pam, albeit one conducted under very formal circumstances; the Yakuza Corporation has lost face with the tainting of Tru Blood. They, like Eric, want Sarah dead and there is, for the moment, a confluence of interests. 

Elsewhere, Andy goes hilariously mad at finding Wafe in bed with Adilyn, and the shouting match between him and Holly is no less funny, the whole thing being both written and played for comic relief. And Nicole announces that she's had enough of Bon Temps and she's taking her pregnant self off home; is Sam coming? It's quite the ultimatum.

The most heartbreaking moment is when Sookie realises that, not only is Bill irrevocably dying with Hep V, but he got it from her. Ouch. No wonder the two of them are growing close once again.

Amber and her annoying sister Sarah aren't getting on well at all. That is, until it turns out that Sarah is the cute firHeo V and Amber isn't going to die. This is, to put it mildly, something of a turning point for the season.

We end with Sookie and Jessica crying over Bill's illness, but not before Violet finds Adilyn and Wade and takes them away. What is she planning?

Another superb episode, needless to say.

True Blood: Lost Cause

"I have been your sex slave for fifteen years, Eric Northman, and we ain't never had sex!"

It's the aftermath of the big battle, and there's a lot of healing to be done, especially for the bereaved Sookie. This being Bon Temps, it's decided (by Lafayette, mostly) that the solution to this is a party at Sookie's. A good time is had by all, and it's left to Nicole, an outsider, to point out how weird this is, and what awaits place Bon Temps has become.

Eric and Pam meet Sarah Newlin's estranged vampire sister, Amber, who has Hep V. She wants Sarah dead too, which usual ful. But everyone else is partying, except Bull who stands outside experiencing flashbacks from the Civil War. We now learn of his scepticism towards the cause of "freedom" to own other human beings, although of course he must be shown to have such views, or he would lose our sympathies. Interestingly, it is this scene that gives the episode its title as Bill knows the war is futile.

There are lots of little character moments; Andy is finally able to forgive Jessica for what she did. Indeed, the wounds and even the distinction between human and wan pure in Bon Temps appear to be slowly withering away. Good. It's a season about subtle shifts, character development and, I think it's clear by now, no Big Bad. It's refreshing.

There are deeply touching moments; Lettue Mar makes a dignified tribute to Tara. Andy makes a sweet proposal to Holly- and she says yes. There is death, but life goes on. Sookie and Arlene have a lovely long meaningful chat about losing your man. And Jessica sees James and Lafayette, who've grown increasingly close, fucking... and Lafayette stands his ground, insisting that Jessica has been neglecting him and that he deserves as much happiness as straight, white people! As for Jessica, she still has Jason, Violet or no Violet.

Meanwhile, Eric and Pam learn that Sarah Newlin'sparents are truly evil; they're at a fundraiser for Ted Cruz and the far right Republican Party. Fortunately they're all massacred by the Yakuza; things could have got nasty. 

The party offends unpleasantly, as Lettie Mae stabs Willa, desperate for her blood. And the episode ends with Eric finding Sarah... and Bill realising he's infected with Hep V.

Another brilliant episode, then, typical of the season. But I'm not sure what the present day "lost cause" was intended to be.

True Blood: Death Is Not the End

"Please don't turn into a rat!"

If the episode wasn't already excellent enough, it ends with a top tune from Bob Dylan that I admittedly know best from the cover by Nick Cave and P.J. Harvey. But I digress. This is another superb episode of excellent, character-based writing and all centred around the devastating effect of a death- in this case Alcide's- in a very different way from the superficially similar use of Terry's death last season.

News travels. To a trailer park in Jackson, Mississippi, as a priapic father discovers he has lost a son. To an oil rig just off Anchorage, Alaska as Aston discovers he's lost a mother- and it's a shock to see Hoyt again. Both are to converge on Louisiana, as are Eric and Pam; Eric wants Sarah Newlin dead, but first there is the matter of Willa, his neglected progeny.

Cue a flashback, as the Magister (remember him?) meets Eric and Pam as they arrive in Shreveport for Eric, the rebel, to be made sheriff of Area 51 as punishment; this is an interesting retconning of the character which reconciles the Eric of the first season with the much more rebellious character he has become. Also fascinating is that the small business they initially ran was a video store with a poem section. Most fascinating of all is Ginger who, before her mind was destroyed by regular glamouring, was a highly intelligent postgrad student specialising in vampire lure. We see her choose her life, in a way, but it's impossible to argue that she knew what she was in for, and we mustn't forget that she's been horribly abused over the seasons. Her life, once full of potential, has been wasted. Much like Alcide's.

Sookie uncovers traumatic memories from Holly, revealing that the Hep V vampires are holding Arlene and the other hostages at- where else?- Fangtasia. Sam, we discover, is rather keen to rescue Nicole and the baby. No one can mourn properly while other friends are in danger. 

There's a big raid, exciting to watch, and all the people we care about are rescued from the Hep B vampires with the help of Bill- and Pam and Eric. Eric tells Sookie that he has a month left, and has been spending the time he has travelling. Death haunts everything in this episode; indeed, this season. Arlene nearly dying, and seeing the spirit of Terry as she nearly goes, is deeply moving even to an atheist like myself.

Sam is well and truly out as a shapechanger; Vince is killed; it seems the forces of bigotry and mob rule are in retreat for now. We are left to reflect on yet another extraordinary piece of television.

 

True Blood: Fire in the Hole

"I'm as big a fan of the French vagina as you are, Eric"

Another episode of superb characterisation, delightfully leisurely pace and beautiful writing here in what is shaping up to be an unexpectedly excellent season. We begin with Sarah Newlin, having swapped her addiction to fundamentalist Christianity to some faux-Hindu hippy "guru" out in LA.

Eric, meanwhile, knows he's dying and has become apathetic. What has he to live for? Cue a retcon and a flashback to the Rhone Valley in 1986, where we learn about Sylvie, a previously unmentioned human love of his. The Authority, and Nan Flanagan, end up killing her and arresting Eric and Pam; that crowbars in a good reason for him to retrospectively hate the Authority. 

Elsewhere, Bill no longer feels when Sookie is in danger after his transfusion. And relationships are shifting; Violet can't give Jason the family life he wants, and James connects far more with fellow druggie Lafayette than he does with the distant Jessica. Bill, meanwhile, has a flashback of his family in 1862, on the eve of war. All this is fascinating.

We end, though, with violence, chaos, Alcide's shocking death, and the urge for one more episode...

True Blood: I Found You

"Don't you try that NRA hillbilly shit on me!"

One episode later and, after an initially worrying first episode, it all looks so different. Can it be that True Blood has found its mojo again? This is all I wanted: character-driven storylines where character serves plot, not vice versa; bloody good writing and acting; and actually being about something, in this case with the return of Eric turning Hep B into a proper, functioning AIDS metaphor.

The whole thing is just a superb script, superbly shot, slowing down to deal with the interiority of its characters; what True Blood has always done best. We begin with a dream sequence in which Jason has sex with Eric (Eric is the bottom!) while Sam is a good mayor and all the characters we know and love are brilliant in handling a crisis which personally affects them as much as anyone. People can be magnificent. And then we have Vince, the epitome of small-minded bigotry, which is depressingly effective at whipping up a mob. People are great as individuals; as a group, less so. Consider 52% of my own country, for example.

Arlene, Holly and the pregnant Nicole are also heroic, in captivity and waiting to die as food but not giving up. Bon Temps is cut off but its population is good in an apocalypse.

We get a disturbing sense of the town's future of the neighbouring town of Saint Alice, its population entirely dead, and this made personal for us through the diary of an obvious parallel for Sookie. It's the apocalypse, but this is used as a jumping off point for character development. 

The episode is triumphant, and the end, with Pam finding Eric in France, promises even more...

True Blood: Jesus Gonna Be Here

"Your God and my God can get a hotel room and have a circle jerk for all I care - I'll be in hell, having a three way with the devil."

Meh. I know I started last season with a palpable lack of enthusiasm but felt things improved towards the end, but this feels worth. It feels like a show trapped in its own mythology, about nothing other than itself, plodding along with nothing to say about the world. Bon Temps is full of humans and vampires together bonded against Hep vampires and... that's it. There's a cool scene with Pam, and James has an interesting and druggy chat with Lafayette. Oh, and Tara dies.

Obviously Tara will be back, and soon. That would be a cheap way to kill a major character, just to liven up a dismaying my lacklustre season opener but... well, what else is there? Sookie and Alcide's relationship is fraying. Jessica is starting to connect, against the odds, with Adilyn, whom she is sworn to protect. Pam is in Marrakech hunting for Eric, who isn't in an episode for the first time in ages.

There's an obvious new villain in Vince, an annoying bigot. Jason finally gets to have sex with Vioket by acting domestic baby, as she's always secretly wanted him to. Lettie Mae and the Reverend Daniels seem to be more central characters, which is interesting. And Sookie's concluding speech is brilliant. But... I hope the season improves.

True Blood: Radioactive

"You guys are the worst fucking makers ever!"

It didn't look like there was a lot for a season finale to do. There was, in the end, but it's nice to have a finale with room to breathe and not needing to move at too fast a pace.

The main point here, of course, is that Warlow is an entitled and abusive man and always was if you were paying attention; his superficial charm is textbook abuser. So he needs to get his comeuppance. It's also interesting to see the contrast offered between the essentially BDSM relationship between Violet and Jason: she "owns" him, and makes him pleasure her daily while denying him release, but it's consensual. Ish. Warlow is just an abusive twat.

Also, we hear the welcome tones of the Breeders' "Cannonball", Bill is back to normal and, ironically, Adilyn is needed to transport everyone to faerie and defeat Warlow. There is much fighting and, at a fairly early point, the goodies win, Warlow is killed and the episode can now do other stuff.

There is a fascinating arrangement proposed for Bon Temps, proposed by Sam, to "pair" each resident with a vampire for protection in return for feeding. It's moving to see Jessica offering to protect Adilyn for nothing. It's also moving to see Tara's no good mother offering to feed her.

We end a surprisingly reflective episode, in a season that started rather rubbishy but ended up ok overall, with Sookie and Bill still estranged and, naturally, marauding vampires...

True Blood: Life Matters

"I fucked your progeny."

It's a brave and oh-so-right decision to dedicate and structure this episode around Terry's funeral, punctuated by the various poignant speeches and the flashbacks illustrating Terry's life, his effect on the community and peoples' effect on him. For a fantasy series it's a very grounded episode about everyday life and everyday tragedy. Every life matters, and every death hurts.

Before all that, Warlow isn't actually dead and Bill is still acting like a twat. But the funeral is the main event, and it is wonderful. 

In other plot threads we have Overlark's fitting death as Eric rampages his revenge in ways that will make a man wince, followed by Bill's coup de grace. And Bill gets his great Christ moment, letting all our favourite vampires eat his blood and not die from the sunlight as his visions foretold they would. Sudden death, and sudden life, both unexpected, juxtaposed. 

All our favourite vampires, that is, except Steve Newlin. Bye Steve.

Jason gets to chase Sarah for the final showdown, heroically refusing to kill her like the good bloke he is. Our vampires live, escape and rejoice... but plenty of infected True Blood is out there. This is ominous...

Wow. What a beautiful piece of telly.  Even as underwhelming a season of this can produce genius like this. I love True Blood.

True Blood: Dead Meat

"Did you just have sex with him?"

"I did."

"How was it?"

"Oozy, but productive."

Alcide's position as packmaster isn't fated to last; no surprise there. His plot thread, and Sam's, is vaguely dull. But the main plots of Warlow and the newly Nazified Sarah have become vaguely interesting of late. It throws up entertaining tangents like Jason, who always has been submissive to women in a kinky way, becoming "owned forever" by a very dominant vampire, Violet, who is going to make him beg to fuck her. This will be interesting, and is an example of how good character writing can save even a lesser season such as this one.

In parallel, Warlow only agrees to help Sookie save her friends if she is his forever, but this feels far creepier. Creepier still is our Dr Mengele making Pam have sex with him in return for better conditions. This is rape, and Mengele is sooo going to regret it. We have w three example hierarchy of twisted sex right there- consensual kinkiness, hints of an abusive nature, and outright rape.

Elsewhere, Arlene finds out that Terry has left her a millionaire, which is nice. Steve Newlin is a dirty, cowardly snitch. And Sam and Sookie meet, and hug, for the first time in ages. Sarah's covering-up of Truman's death leads, inevitably, to a gruesomely entertaining murder; she's crossed a line here and you just know she won't survive the season.

But we end with Warlow apparently dead. Has Eric killed him? This is a brilliant episode. Is the season coming good at the very end?

True Blood: In the Evening

"Well, this is a first- waking up with a man in broad daylight."

The vampires we know are to be told about the Hep V, courtesy of Eric, but no one else, which is nice. Meanwhile, Bill refuses to save Nora as it goes against her dying wish; this doesn't exactly please Eric. And Sarah plans to officially cover up Truman's death and take charge.

There's a sense of the endgame being in sight from all this, in this shorter season of ten episodes, with most vampires conveniently located in the heart of the beast and the Nazi metaphor quietly betrayed in spite of the many Dr. Mengeles. It's a nice touch that the senator helping Sarah is doing so to hide the fact that he, a social conservative, is in fact gay; indeed, he was fucking Lafayette a few seasons ago.

Sookie is a good friend to the devastated Arlene. But at least, it seems, Arlene won't be poor, with Terry's life insurance to be paid out. Jessica finds James, warns him and (of course) fucks him. Butcher end with Bill telling all to Sookie and demanding Warlow, whose blood he needs to save the day. Bill as a character is simply not at all played or written to be likeable at this point, an interesting choice.

Another good episode. Perhaps the second half of the season will after all redeem it?

True Blood: Don't You Feel Me

"I'm gonna need you to tie me up..."

Predictably it's Warlow who saves Sookie, and Lafayette is himself again. Warlow is now in her good books and she's utterly disgusted, unsurprisingly, with her father.

Jason joins the anti-vampire Gestapo undercover in an attempt to rescue Jessica, and impresses people; he may be dim, but he's loyal and has skills, bless him. Sookie and Warlow get closer and closer, with hints of kinkiness in his vampire side. And Andy gets so close to his surviving daughter that he gives her a name: Adilyn. Number Four just won't cut it now.

Lafayette lets Arlene know the rather blatant fact that Terry is suicidal. They attempt to change his feelings by means of Lafayette's powers, but unfortunatwly this makes her m forget the danger he's in. He dies in Arlene's arms, and it's shocking and horrible. 

This dominates the episode. Other things happen- Sam vs Alcide, the revelation that Warlow want to turn Sookie and marry her, Jason and Sarah confronting each other- but this one, awful event hangs over everything.

A vampire called James turns out to be a gentleman, not raping Jessica as ordered in spite of both his torture and her low self-esteem. Oh, and Bill unexpectedly walk up to Truman and beheads him. Nice. Rather more upsetting is the death of Nora in Eric's arms; there's a lot of death in this episode.

We end with the revelation that Sarah (now clearly on charge) means to manufacture new Tru Blood spiked with Hepatitis V: genocide. And Sookie is, er, getting in rather well with Warlow. An unexpectedly gripping and emotional episode.

True Blood: Fuck the Pain Away

"And I firmly believe God wants me to fuck you!"

So, apparently Warlow loves Sookie and she is his "intended": that's a little creepy. And then there's Jessica, distraught with guilt over murdering the fairy girls yet high on their blood. It doesn't take much to guess there's a lot more religious angst in store for her. It's quite an opening and I am, for once this season, almost hopeful about the episode.

Warlow, it seems, hates being a vampire, and killed Sookie's parents to stop them killing her, quite a bombshell. So is the fact that Bill, being part-Lilith, turns up to order Warlow around as his maker, a nice twist. 

Only one of Andy's girls are alive; this must be devastating. Understandably he's furious at Bill, under whose roof this all happened. Tara and Eric are also displeased, in their case about Pam being taken to the camps, and proceed to spend much of the episode being badass together. Things are getting bad fast, especially with Sarah whispering all that poison into Truman's ear.

Speaking of Sarah, after her inevitable shag with Jason (one up on her estranged husband there), she gets into a mismatched cat fight with Jessica, who is so not in the mood. Less lighthearted is the fact that Terry has just hired an old war mate to kill him; in effect, suicide by hit man. Last season's adventures with the Ifrit were all too much for him. 

Pam is fascinating when she says that, yes, she was distraught about Eric but that's over now. Vampires are old, with a long-term view, and "pain is a worthless emotion". This is a nice contrast with Terry in an episode all about the emotional pain people carry. At last, an episode this season that's actually about the human condition.

Lafayette helps Sookie to learn her parents knew about Warlow and wanted her to die so she wouldn't be turned by Warlow. Blimey. 

There's also a flashback from 3496 BC, with Warlow returning to his village and massacring everyone except Niall, another violent event causing lasting pain for so many. 

We end on a double cliffhanger, with Pam and Steve Newlin forced to fight while Lafayette, possessed by Sookie's dad, tries to drown her. This episode is much better.

True Blood: At Last

"You deserve to be one of us..."

We get the shocking reveal at the start that Ben, a half-fairy, is also a vampire, as he immediately uses his own blood to heal Jason. It seems a hybrid such as himself can walk freely in the Sun. There's more exposition as Nora explains, before being shot, that Warlow (this is where it clicked for me that he was Ben, an impressive reveal) is said by the Vampire Bible to be the only person who can kill Lilith.

Meanwhile Andy's fairy daughters are now teenagers, and Eric turns Willa (the first time since Pam that he has done this) both because she impresses him and to torment her father. Sam starts to develop a relationship with Nicole. 

Truman is appalled and heartbroken at what has happened to his daughter; Sarah is just straightforwardly evil. It's clear that she's both the power behind the throne and the true Big Bad. She persuades Truman to send his own daughter to the camp.

Interestingly, Warlow still seems to have purely romantic intentions towards Sookie in spite of being a vampire. But we end with a hungry Jessica, unable to control herself, killing Andy's fairy daughters for their blood. Oops...

This is much better; at last we're getting real drama and intrigue.