The Sopranos: I Dream of Jeannie Cusamano

"Cunnilingus and psychiatry brought us to this."

This is a fitting, perfect and superlative finale- almost. It wraps everything up nicely (except for Pussy's whereabouts) in terms both of plot and character arcs, It a supremely well structured, written, shot and acted hour of telly. But there's one horrifying moment of bigotry that seriously maims this finale. And that's a shame.

We begin with a calm, cheerful, reinvigorated Tony plotting is revenge while the Feds are planning to strike- and the season finale is a likely time for them to do so. And then a lot of things happen.

The first to die is Jimmy, the rat- his death ordered by Tony after Junior gives the nod. Meanwhile Tony is scarily violent towards Dr Melfi when she suggests his mother may be behind the attempt on his life as punishment for putting her in a home, seemingly severing that relationship forever- only to be played a tape by the FBI which proves Dr Melfi right by doubt. Their later reconciliation is, though seemingly unlikely, both convincing and touching- here is one woman whom Tony seriously respects.

One relationship that is certainly severed is between Carmela and Father Phil, whom she confronts magnificently. She says that he manipulates "spiritually thirsty women", that he's a parasite who enjoys "the whiff of sexuality that never goes anyplace". Ouch. Whether any of this may be aimed at religion in general is not something I will be touching with a bargepole anytime soon.

Junior's two main underlings are killed by Tony's underlings, after he tells them of his seeing a shrink- and cleverly uses that to tie them to him. Junior escapes only by being arrested and charged- and, with his old school valus of Omerta, Tony is ironically now safe, and secure as boss. We end with a nice moment as Tony proposes a toast to his "family"- but which one?

Splendid telly, then. Except... it's suggested, probably accurately, that Livia may have borderline personality disorder. Fair enough, and more than plausible. But let's say I've been close to someone with BPD, and when Dr Melfi is made to say that "these people have no love or compassion".... wow. I'm speechless. Let's just say that I have a more nuanced view. This is a truly shocking thing to hear, it mars the episode severely, and it may be some time before I watch the second series.

A shame. There's no denying the quality here.

The Sopranos: Isabella

"Top guys have dark moods..."

The penultimate episode, and Tony has succumbed completely to the black dog, in what is a fascinating way to portray depression through performance, music and artistic camerawork- even with a snippet of Garbage's splendid "Temptation Waits". But this seems to be a bad time for this to happen; despite Junior's obvious unease, and disinclination to know the details, the hit on Tony is about to happen.

It's an interesting point in the season to go full-on in the portrayal of depression- but the conceit is, of course, that the experience of almost dying gives Tony the jolt he needs, something which the Prozac and Valium didn't manage to do. He finishes the episode feeling good and raring for revenge.

It’s not just an episode focused on Tony, though; Junior spends the whole episode uneasy, and nearly panics when the “carjacking” goes awry. And Livia, in quite a state of cognitive dissonance having pretty much instigated her own son’s attempted murder, starts to show more serious signs of dementia. And Tony’s dream of Isabella, the exchange student next door, is clearly important, especially once it’s revealed that he imagined her- a properly loving mother figure, as opposed to his actual mother. Who is always talking about infanticide. Hmm. This is very clever and gripping telly.

Also significantly, Tony turns down an offer of immunity from the FBI- he swore an oath, he’s reinvigorated and there’s an episode to go. He has things to do...

The Sopranos: Nobody Knows Anything

"A feeling of pending doom?"

This is indeed a doom-laden episode, as dark as Tony's mood, full of paranoia, depression and unease, and making both us and the characters question things. The FBI are on the warpath, and the ground is shifting beneath everyone's feet.

The main plot thread centres on the presence of a mole, and the possibility- plausible, until the last moment- that likeable old Pussy may be wearing a wire for the Feds. This turns out to be a massive piece of misdirection, but damage has been done- we end with Pussy missing and Tony despondent, looking very much at risk of a further panic attack.

Worse, Tony's pet cop reaches a low after his arrest for using a bordello, and jumps off a bridge. And Livia shows herself to be truly evil, as allegedly poisonous as her namesake. We have an early scene where Carmela visits her, rolling her eyes at the obvious tricks and calling her out on her manipulative ways. But far more gullible is Junior, who she finally manipulates into decoding to kill her son- and it's fascinating to ponder why she hates him so. Tony ends the episode oblivious, but in real danger.

e also have one bit of comic relief around the dinner table- Meadow, interestingly, sides very much with the recently impeached President Clinton whose misdeeds were, yes, not remotely as nefarious as those of the imbecile Trump, but nevertheless a massive abuse of power. 1999, in some respects, was a very long ago, much as it may not feel so.

As ever, a superb piece of telly. Not long now until the season is don...

The Sopranos: Boca

"They made me an offer I couldn't refuse..."

This episode is largely about, to use a term we wouldn't have used in 1999, toxic masculinity. It seems weird to me now, and did at the time, that anyone could consider cunnilingus- Exhibit A for actually caring about pleasing a woman in bed- to be in some way unmanly, but apparently it was considered so, at least in the circles where one risked sleeping with the fishes.

This is all in the context of nerves brought about by an obviously tightening FBI net that seems extremely likely to at least send Junior to a retirement home considerably less pleasant than Livia's, but Junior is extremely humiliated as the rumours spread that he is not averse to heading south. But Junior has a countermeasure as Tony mocks him at golf, in turn spreading the rumour that Tony sees a psychiatrist. Giving oral is one thing- but a man with feelings...?

Of course, what is "manly" is subjective. Here, in the America of 1999, all the daughters play football ("soccer") for their team- it's primarily a sport for girls in '90s America, here in England it was- and is- as macho a sport as they come, with women's football only gaining serious acceptance in the last few years. But the debate here is how to react to a coach who abuses his position to groom and sexually abuse a teenage girl. And, interestingly, Tony ultimately decides- following the advice of Dr Melfi and his henpecked friend Artie- not to whack the coach and instead to let the law take its course. Toxic masculinity is here outweighed by the feminine.

But no one escapes unscathed. In heartbreaking scenes we see Junior dump his girlfriend of sixteen years, Bobbie, leaving her distraught and crying why he suppresses his feelings, because boys don't cry.

I think the big clash between Tony and Junior has now become inevitable. Never mind the future, though. What an episide,

The Sopranos: The Legend of Tennessee Moltisani

"Where's my arc?"

Another clever episode, this, and probably the

closest this programme has ever come to skirting with the fourth wall. Christopher, a minor character, thug and thicko, has an episode of angst about the fact he's just a minor character, a Rosencrantz or a Guildenstern, and not destined to be the deepest or most developed. Him being a bit of a prat, this consists of his failing to write (or spell) a film script, digging up a body and shooting a baker in the foot because he has to wait. Even his possible depression is made to look shallow in a discussion with Tony, a proper character. And the end shows all to be cured by him getting his name in the paper. Pillock.

There’s more fun with the fourth wall as we finally spend some time with Dr Melfi’s wealthy, educated yet dysfunctional family- and they morally disapprove when Jennifer lets slip the nature of her latest client. This leads, though, to her pompous husband pontificating about the Mafia-dominated depiction of Italian-Americans in the media. The irony of this being said in The Sooranos is not, I’m sure, lost on anyone.

This is all very fun, but we’re also reminded of the morality of what Tony and others do- Christopher is haunted by dreams of the Czech gangster he killed, and is reassured that it gets easier the more he killed. And, when Tony is told by Dr Melfi that he must pay for the session he missed, his scary reaction forces her to confront what he is- not evil, as that isn’t a grown-up concept, but perhaps someone she should keep at arm’s length. Will she keep him as a client? Perhaps the damage us done,  though. Livia has told Junior that Tony is seeing a psychiatrist.

Ultimately this episode is full of foreboding. The FBI are said to have indictments ready to go and people are jumpy. Tony’s house is searched just after the evidence has been hidden at Livia’s. and they know about Junior. So what next?

This is superb episode- fun, metatextual but full of ill omen...

The Sopranos: Down Neck

"Meadow was one thing- this is my son."

A particularly good episode this time as we deal with the themes of destiny versus free will in the terms of whether children are fated to repeat the mistakes of their parents- and the corruption of being brought up by the fruits of immoral earnings. This latter point applies not only to Mafia families but to all of us, as Tony implies with his comments on polluters- but don’t we all benefit from slave labour in poor countries, and don’t we all contribute to unsustainable emissions of CO2, something far more acute now than twenty years ago?

Yes. 1999 was twenty years ago. I know, it’s appalling.

We have two parallel storylines of Mafia sons- young Anthony is found bucking and drinking communion wine at school which leads to friction between Carmela and Tony over whether or not he has ADD, a great ‘90s debate to fit alongside, well, Prozac. The two of them eventually unite over the view that it’s all over-medicalised bollocks but, of course, the truth is more subjective as it always will be with any condition where one needs to exhibit a number of subjective indicators. ADHD, like personality disorders, may be artificial constructs, but they can be useful. And Tony learns that Anthony knows, from school, what he does for a living. There’s a lot of angst about the younger generation finding out about “this thing of ours” and how it affects their life chances- but, on the other hand, it’s Mafia money that sends the Soprano kids to private schools.

This is contrasted with fascinating flashbacks first appearing after a superb semi-dreamlike sequence in which Tony wakes up to his wife and son rowing in the background, and takes his Prozac to the splendid sound of Jefferson Airplane’s famous trippy rodent-based classic. This takes him back to 1967, a world of parental authority and casual racism, and the first time he sees his father and uncle beating a bloke up- and seeing his father getting arrested. We also see how disturbing his mother was even back then (“I could stick this fork in your eye!”) and how she gave Johnny so much emasculating drama- stopping them from moving to Reno where, in hindsight, they could have made billions.

We also have Livia finding out about Tony’s psychiatrist and reacting as one would expect. And, of course, we get a mention of South Park’s seminal “Cartman Gets an Anal Probe” as a top 1999 pop culture reference. This is bloody good telly.

The Sopranos: Pax Soprana

“If you were a dildo, we wouldn't be fighting".

This episode is fascinating, and a realignment in a couple of contexts as Tony is forced to accept that Dr Melfi is romantically out of bounds, he persuades Junior to act as a benevolent boss, and he and Carmela start to work on their marriage. Of course, it’s all actually much more nuanced than that.

Things come to a proper head with Dr Melfi. Tony not only had erotic dreams about her but can only maintain an erection when thinking of her- even his Ukrainian “goomar” can’t satisfy him. So we have the scene where he slowly, embarrassingly describes his impotence to Dr Melfi, declares his love and kisses her- and she reacts firmly and professionally on stopping him there, explaining that the things he finds attractive about her are just a part of her role. She seems remarkable tolerant of finding out that he had her followed, and stole her car to fix it- but then, she knows what he is agreed to take him as a client, regardless. Dr Melfi, in spite of her role, isn’t quite a blank canvas of a character. It will be fun to find out more about what makes her tick.

Meanwhile Carmela is upset during an awkward anniversary meal and reacts passively aggressively in ways that don’t help Tony’s stress- but she’s right. Tony does see “goomars” despite his protestations. And he has been neglecting her in every way, prioritising everything else. Even worth is that Father Phil, who is supposed to be her friend, is a misogynist arsehole with his advice. He firmly rules out all suggestion of divorce, although it’s clearly immoral to trap people in formal couplings they no longer consent to. And he blames her for tolerating his earlier dalliances, saying that she is “not entirely without sin”. It’s a distressing scene to watch, and leads us to question the foundations of their attempt at reconciliation at the end, where it’s her who persuades him to keep on seeing Dr Melfi.

Also worrying is Junior’s autocratic style as boss, taking and not giving as boss, but it’s Tony who handles this with a little speech about Octavian- I like his penchant for Roman history. But there’s some interesting dialogue in which Tony and other capos admit that Junior is boss because someone has to take the fall if the Feds come calling and it’s better it be an old man without children- and, as we see at the end, the FBI are on to them. Although the board with pinned photos and post-it notes is the most 1999 thing ever...

Superlative as always.

The Sopranos: Meadowlands

"Hear about the Chinese godfather? He made him an offer he couldn't understand..."

The Sopranos is extraordinary, four episodes in. Yes, the first episode grabs you immediately and is a show-offishly and performatively classy piece of television. Subsequent episodes have been more restrained- no flashy direction, realistic rather than knowingly witty dialogue, but a masterclass on how to build a slow-burning and rich serial narrative.

Here we have a number of turning points, all seeming to emerge naturally from plot, certainly, but more importantly from character. We have some flashy direction in the dreamlike beginning as Tony has a surreal dream about Melfi's office in which worlds collide and it becomes clear that he fancies this somehow unattainable woman, who for once appears vulnerable. The bent cop that Tony ends to spy on her ends up beating and traumatising her boyfriend, unwittingly giving her a taste of Tony's violent world- and reminding us, by breaking the barriers separating the two worlds, that Tony is a very bad man, however much we may emphasise with his family problems.

The two worlds collide elsewhere, too, as young Anthony Jr is rudely ripped from his cosy teenage 1999 world of Super Mario Kart and mildly rubbish, forgotten metal bands by the realisation that there's a reason why, as Meadow points out, they can afford such a massive house on the wages of a "waste disposal consultant".

Tony has two families, both with simmering problems. His mother is as passive-aggressive and emotionally cruel as ever. And the death of the sincerely mourned Jackie seems to be leading inexorably to a Soprano vs. Soprano "War of '99", So Tony's creative solution, based on some unlikely advice from Melfi, unexpectedly undercuts this while showing a lot of guts- to let Junior be "acting boss" while being the power behind the throne- or so he thinks.

Incidentally, we learn that Jackie, dead at 44, had only been "acting boss" for two years. And the "boss", not a Soprano, is 74 and doing life. And, despite the power games and constant Godfather quotes, the Government is watching them all. There's a sense that the throne Tony wants is that of a shrinking empire...

This is bloody good stuff. And, just when you think the episode can't get any better, it ends with a bit of Mazzy Star...

The Sopranos: 46 Long

"Time and patience change the mulberry leaf to silk..."

We've had the introductions; now we get straight on with developing the characters and arc plot as David Chase hands over to lesser mortals to write and helm this second episode. The result is not quite as superlative but nevertheless constitutes superior telly. 1999 was a long time ago, though; no one has a mobile phone and a pay phone plays an important role, the Internet is not a thing for most people, while DVD’s are fancy new tech. It all felt very modern at the time, with the Millennium approaching.

Carmela and the kids take a back seat as this episode focuses on Mob conflicts and Tony's impossible relationship with his mother. The opening scene is suitably ominous, with a poker game soundtracked by a news programme about the inexorable decline of what we never hear described as the Mafia- and of omerta. Tony and his lieutenants Paulie, Big Pussy and Silvio- all fleshed out a little more in this episode- take refuge in pop culture references to The Godfather; Martin Scorcese's later cameo appearance is certainly appropriate.

This is a dysfunctional crime family; Giacomo (Jackie) is seemingly acting boss while some senior Soprano (isn't Tony's dad dead?) is in the slammer, but tensions are growing between Tony and his prickly Uncle Junior. These are largely because of the combination of Tony's incredibly thick and arrogant nephew Christopher and his even worse friend Brendan, both of whom keep robbing Junior’s stuff. This seems to reach almost a crisis, and frankly I’m surprised Tony doesn’t shoot Brendan. But he certainly isn’t happy.

Far worse than any of this, though, even the comical and Tarantinoesque shooting dead of the lorry driver, is Tony’s purgatory at the hands of Livia, the passive aggressive and drama-loving mother from Hell who knows how to wound with words. We learn that Tony has sisters who are estranged from her mother, but in setting her hob on fire and running over a friend she makes it clear that she can no longer live alone, spurning help with a combination of casual racism and emotional knife twisting. It’s no surprise that Tony’s mother- Nancy Marchand is brilliant- causes him such emotional turmoil, and Dr Melfi fulfils the time of Greek chorus here; this is far from a normal mother/son relationship. And it’s far from a normal television drama, too. More please.

The Sopranos: Pilot

“Here comes the Prozac...”

If you suspect that I’m starting The Sopranos mainly because I need some brain food to go alongside the not-exactly-intellectual Batman and Robin movie serial, you’re right. I’m only going to do the first season for now and then pause, but it’ll be enjoyable. I’ve seen this season, and this season only, before- on BBC2 in 1999, in my bedroom in my parents’ house, when I was 22. I suppose, prior to 1999 and HBO coming out with this, we Brits, while consuming a lot of American telly, considered it, on average and with many obvious exceptions, to be more lowbrow than our telly with its formulaic, 22 episode seasons. The Sopranos, and its ushering in of the golden age of American telly through which we’re living, changed that forever.

It’s an impressive start with the titles, a splendid tune, and spectacular views of the New Jersey turnpike, and then we begin- with Tony Soprano, in a shrink’s waiting room, looking at a statue in a scene which pretty much exists to show us, by being artily directed, that we are to expect cleverness. And so we have the early awkward exchanges as Tony and Dr Melli size each other up, he relating how he came to have his recent panic attack- we learn about his failing marriage with Carmela, his son Anthony being (as we see) a bit of a dick and a rather epic row between Carmela and their daughter Meadow. But there is also, of course, his other “family”, the family business of “waste disposal” and the rather hilarious juxtapositions of violent scenes and narration such as “we had coffee”. Dr Melfi, of course, knows. But she doesn’t “know”.

Worse than this, though, are the looming crises. Tony’s mother, Livia (an interesting name of one happens to have recently blogged I, Clavdivs) is the mum from Hell- dramatic, judgemental, hypocritical, resentful, with a degree in passive aggressiveness. And then there’s Junior, Tony’s uncle, the older brother of his late father, a proud and prickly old man who resents To t being boss and not him. Then there’s his arrogant dick of a nephew, Christopher. All this in a world where the Mafia is in decline, being squeezed by the law, and living in the glories of old movies, its future bleak and the old code of Omertà no longer a given. Oh, and Tony is having an affair with a trophy girl while Carmela is hanging around with a handsome priest who, to his credit, at least prefers the first Godfather movie.

There’s lots of wit but the fourth wall is never quite broken- I love that Junior (an absurd “name” for an old man!) is going to “whack” “Big Pussy” at the restaurant of Tony’s friend, ruining his business- the main A plot of the episode, solved by a judicious bit of arson, and Tony says “You think he’s gonna fuck with Big Pussy? My pussy?”... All is player straight, of course. And James Gandolfini is incredible, portraying real depth and subtlety.

We end, though, with a menacing exchange between Junior- a stupid old bigot who resents the old days of “the crazy hair, and the dope” and now whinges about that old ‘90s battleground of “fags in the military” and Livia, as “things may have to be done” about Tony.

This is simply superlative television, from the very start. I’m going to enjoy this.