"You'll never get away with this, you Martian!"
Well... very bad. Very bad indeed. Come back, Teenagers from Outer Space; all is forgiven. In fact, bah humbug. This is a film in which Martians kidnap Santa Claus by using a silly '50s robot that may actually be made from cardboard boxes. This is a film where two children, dressed normally yet just feeling a bit cold, are menaced in the North Pole by a polar bear that is obviously a main in a suit on all fours- and this isn't even a low point.
This is, indeed, a film centred around the concept that Martian kids are a bit subdued and in need of cheering up, so the Martiand kidnap Santa. Yes, really. Also, the music is horrible, athough intentionally funny in places. But the film, overall, struggles to meet even the basic requirements of low camp fun, dragging despire its short length and being much better to read about than to watch. John Case is actually a pretty good Santa but the rest of the cast, quite wisely, phone it in. I'd recommend this to the connoisseur of awful cinema, but this film should not under any circumstances be approached without alcohol.
What's extraordinary, though, is that it all seems to be done with a straight face. Someone made, financed and promoted this film, presumably believing on some level that it was, if not good, at least not an unforgivable crime against culture. I suppose, for that reason, if no other, it ofers us some much-needed mindless optimism during this plague-ridden Christmas as our equally mindless prime minister threatens to hurl us into economic hell out of sheer xenophobic stupidity. Ho ho ho.
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