Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D: The Bridge

"Did I beat Captain America's time?"

This one ends on a cliffhanger. Of course it bloody ends on a cliffhanger, as this is the last episode before Christmas and Channel 4 are not going to start showing Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D again for ages. Grr. No doubt loads of people will just watch the torrents and therefore not bother watching it when it's back on telly, causing Channel 4 to drop the programme because of "falling ratings". Such are the absurd anachronisms of television scheduling in 2014. I'm in the slow lane, so the blogging of this show will continue when it's back on Channel 4.

What's doubly frustrating is that not only is Coulson kidnapped, he's kidnapped for the express reason of finding out what happened with his resurrection and "Tahiti", as has been seeded throughout the season for a long time now.

Other things happen, of course. The big bad is a group of super soldiers calling itself Centipede. Mike Peterson is back, this time using his superpowers for the benefit of S.H.I.E.L.D, although not without a conflict of loyalties between his employers and his eminently kidnappable son. J. August Richards is, of course, a far more charismatic actor than any of the regular cast, and by far the best thing in this.

We first see May and Ward fighting each other in what seems to be either training or foreplay. I bet they have rather kinky sex. We also see Simmons, rather endearingly, perving on Mike in the most blatant manner possible. It's a good episode for shippers.

There's also a lot of intrigue about Coulson, which in hindsight acts as foreshadowing for the end of the episode: Coulson has a partner whom he has not been allowed to see since his resurrection, which must hurt. Also intriguing is his conversation with May about Skye; they have agreed to "protect" Skye from the awful truth of what happened with her parents. We also begin to recognise the girl in the flower dress, this being her third appearance. Centipede have been behind an awful lot of things that have happened over this season, and are controlling a number of people in the same way they controlled Akela Amadour. They are nimble, mysterious and either really cool or really annoying. Time will tell.

Nothing can be more annoying, though, than being suspended on a cliffhanger like that.