Agatha All Along: Circle Sewn with Fate / Unlock Thy Hidden Gate

 "Witches like you are the reason people think we poison apples, and steal children, and eat babies."

"Babies are delicious..."

This is, of course, a wnderful piece of television. Agatha is a glorious protagonist- a baddie, and unashamedly so. Witty, humorous, amoral and delightfully free wit all the meta humour.

I've no idea where this is going, of course, but it's fun. The only characters I know from the comics are Agatha herself and a version of Jennifer Kale, not that I have in fact read Steve Gerber's Man-Thing issues. I suspect the fact we (and Agatha) are censored so very diegetically as to who the teen is means he's someone we may have heard of. But otherwise this is continuity-lite. Oh, and it's an almost entirely female cast with one gay boy. This is going to annoy all the right people. Good.

This episode is a fun riff on a kind of dark fairytale structure, which is of course enormous fun... and they all get into the road just before Agatha's hooded assassins arrive. Our motley crew is now on the road, and I have no idreawhere this is going, or who or what all those animals are. But I'm proper hooked.

Elizabeth (1998)

 "It is no easy thing to be loved by the Queen. It would corrupt the heart of any man".

Before I praise this wonderful film, I'll get a few criticisms out of the way. 

So... the opening text- in a terrible font, incidentally- misspells the word "fervent"and has "halfsister" with no hyphen. And the closing text has England as "the richest and most powerful country in Europe"... er, no. Pre-industrial England, indeed pre-agricultural revolution England, was a middling country whose population was never going to be as big as a France or a Spain- England, I suppose, was more of a Netherlands or a Portugal.

Also, a lot of history is telescoped into a short time and the chronology is inevitably off. William Cecil is shown asan old man in the 1550s and dismissed early in Elizabeth's reign. Francis Walsingham is spymaster and Machiavel from day one. And did the future King Henri III of France really wear dresses and have sex with his aunt, the Queen Regent of Scotland?

And yet, I think, we have to accept this as a creative necessity. History is not easily crammed into two hours of screen time without being adjusted to fit. And this film, text aside, is magnificent.

Too often, history in cinema is shot in a dull, staid, Merchant Ivory way. Not here. Shekhar Kapur uses light, colour, claustrophobia and perspective wonderfully. We open with a truly shocking scene of three martyrs being burned at the stake, the sheer horror of it all being emphasised. Mary's court is dark and without joy, Kathy Burke giving us a Mary who has always been the underdog, and even as queen is humiliated by her neglectful husband and the nature of the cancer that kills her. She is bitter, resentful... yet cannot sign her sister's death warrant.

Elizabeth's accession is symbolised by two flashes of white light. We see the aftermath of the bloody battle in Scotland via the camera panning across the River Tweed running with blood. The look of the film is exquisite. Yet so are the performances. Cate Blanchett is, of course, a revelation, but the performances of Joseph Fiennes, Christopher Eccleston and Geoffrey Rush are equally superb.

This film is a triumph. Just try and ignore the text.

The Lord of the Rings- The Rings of Power: Eldest

 "Harfoots, living in holes! It doesn't feel natural."

This seasoin has already kicked up a gear... but now this. We have Tom Bombadil, and he;s Rory Kinnear! Barrow Wights, which look amazing! ENTS!!!

But mostly we focus on a party of elves which foreshadow the Fellowship: we also have a Caradhras moment. And we end with Galadriel, foreshadowing Boromir, using herself as bait so Elrond and the others can escape from the orcs and warn Gil-Galad that Adar's orcs are coming.

Except... that means their mission to Celebrimbor is delayed, leaving plenty of time for the forging of rings...

And then we have the Stranger finding Bombadid, about whom we learn a few things- he is the "eldest", older that the stars, yet he can only offer wisdom, not act. The Stranger is rapt with respect for him, realising his own purpose: to defeat both Sauron and this Dark Wizard, who could simply never be allowed to join forces.

And then we have Nori and Poppy who discover more halflings, the Stoor. And they discover tragedy: the Harfoots once split from the Stoors looking for some non-existent Eden... and are wandering still. Ouch! One day, I hope they find their Shire. All this is beautiful, fairy tale stuff.

But then we have Isildur, Estrid and Arondir. Isildur and Estrid draw closer... until Arondir discovers the truth: despite their real attraction, she is one of the Wild Men. We have a brilliant moment with a CGI swamp monster... but the drama is palpable. We share Isildur's disappointment when she finds her betrothed.

And yet... ENTS!!!

This season gets better and better

Batman: The Animated Series- Pretty Poison

 "She's not right for you..."

This is, perhaps, a simple episode: Harvey Dent is poisoned by his girlfriend, one Pamela Isley, the poison administered by a kiss, and all done in revenge for the flowers made extinct by the building of Gotham's new prison, Harvey's dream. And so we have some detective work and a showdown involving a splendid Venus flyutrap.

That's it.

Except... there are so many little things, so many nuances. I'm loving how we're starting with Dent back in the days when he used be more, er, singular, and Harvey's rapport with his friend Bruce Wayne is fun. I also like the script's wry commentary- what kind of man has a prison as his dream? The caption "A better, safer, Gotham" as we fast forward to the finished prison is delicious.

Then we have the juxtapostion of Batman recapturing an escaped prisoner to Harvey's description of rich businessman Bruce, who has, er, no secrets from Harvey. Incidentally, are they going for businessman Bruce, 70s style, with Lucius Fox, back in the days when Steve Engelhart did his run, as opposed to Bruce the playboy? We'll see.

Bullocks and the donuts is a delicious touch, though. As is the plot, the revelation, Poison Isley's personality and the conclusion. Even if, like me, you know who Pamela Isley is from the start, this episode is particularly good.

Agatha All Along: Seekest Thou the Road

 "Did you know that it's a universally acknowledged truth that a lasy cop cannot be good at her job and have a happy home life at the same time"

Just one episode... and, yeah, on present evidence this is going to be as good as WandaVision. Jac Schaeffer, at this point, can seemingly do no wrong.

We 're in Westview, and Agatha is apparently a maverick detective in a cop show, which allows for all sorts of fun with the genre and winys to the fourth wall, from assaulting a suspect to a boss who boss who appears to be the very person for whom the word "lugubrious" was coined. Best of all, of course, is the spoof opening titles proclaiming the show to be based on a Danish original, a nice genre touch.

Of course, we don't see the face of the mudrdered woman... but, of course, it's Wanda. And hints of both Wanda and the Darkhold slowly penetrate through the layers of Agatha's reality in time for a showdown with the rather awesome Rio Vidal.I have no idea where this is going, but it's awesome. The closing titles themselves, with Donovan and every witch in popular culture to which Disney has access, are a thing of wonder. More please.

Inspector Morse: The Secret of Bay 5B

 "We were just saying you look very, um, off duty tonight..."

Inspector Morse, somehow more than any television programme of the era, beautifully evokes the many little nuances of the UK in the late 1980s. The cars. The telephones. The fact that middle aged people, the age I am now, would never be seen in jeans and t-shirt. The casual sexism. The existence of the stay-at-home housewife. Middle aged people speaking a kind of received pronunciation that these days is the preserve only of the very old. And, indeed, the lack of CCTV in multi-storey car parks.

The story, perhaps more than most in this third series, is nicely and subtly done. We build a picture of the murdered man- successful, arrogant, a womniser with no poetry in his soul- the polar opposite of Morse who, curmudgeon that he is, continues to pursue a rather sweet romance with Dr Russell, very much not the sort of thing one may expect of the cruder Morse of the novels.

The twists at the end, just at the point where it seems we may have run out of road, are very clever indeed- and it's nice that certain points are made subtly, with no need to force feed the viewer. Sex, greed, blackmail, fury, passion... it's all here. Life is messy, complicated, often dark... yet there is also art, music and good real ale. Morse's is a melancholy world, but not one without its comforts. Much like our own, perhaps.

The Lord of the Rings- The Rings of Power: The Eagle and the Sceptre

 "You're not my father..."

More good stuff here as Sauron's dark persuasive powers continue to bear rotting fruit. He convinces Celebrimbor to lie to Gil-Galad about the rings, but convincingly, playing on Celebrimbor's artistic pride like a lute, or whatever stringed instrument elves prefer to use. And the rings are the reason Durin finally makes himself apologise to his father. We end with the five Dwarven rings about to be forged- no doubt to save Khazad-Dum from the volcano. Yet at what cost?

We also return to Isildur. His adventures are many, not least with a convincingly horrible Shelob-like arachnid. Yet he meets a girl and connects with her- future wife, from whom Aragorn will, surely, be descended?

He also meets Arondir, who struggles to connect with the orphaned young Theo... unlike Isildure, who also lost hs mother at a young age. And the circumstances of how this happened tell us much about his drive to greatness. All of this is very good writing.

Yet the true drama is in Numenor, where we return for the first time this season. All episode we hear rumours about the unpopular, blind, Queen Regent, only for uproar and revelations to derail the coronation... and for the traditional eagle (why does it not speak?) to choose Pharazon instead. 

As with every episode this season so far, this is exciting, dramatic writing, and it's about a series of character who are all flawed in their own way. Compared to the first season, a lot seems to be happening, amd fast...

Carry On Cowboy (1965)

 "I know a horse backfiring when I hear one!"

When I first saw this film many years ago I was, perhaps, more impressed than I was this time around, but it's still one of the better Carry Ons. The sets, locations and costumes genuinely look great: everything truly looks like the Old West. Although...well, the accents? Let's not go there.

We've settled into the cast we know from the peak of Carry On. Kenneth Williams really shines in a role that allows him to give a different but superb comic performance as the strait-laced yet hypocritical judge. Jim Dale is perfect as the hapless hero, and Sid James is strangely perfect as the baddie. Angela Douglas, though,is superb as the daughter seeking revenge for her father's murder. Bernard Bresslaw and Peter Butterworth now seem to be core cast members, with Kenneth Connors no longer a mainstay.

Charles Hawtrey as the chief of the "Indians"... yeah, that's weird, but they he was a somewhat weird man so that's not surprising. The stereotypes are, naturally, all wheeled out- smoke signals, "how", scalping, "firewater".

The jokes land well, as ever, the best being when the Rumpo Kid goes to "get" some money from the bank: we know what to expect from a Talbot Rothwell script. But both the production values and the performances serve to make this, if not right up with the best, one of the better Carry Ons.

Batman: The Animated Series- The Last Laugh

 "The only things gaining now are the laughing stocks..."

A second Joker episode in quick succession, and... it's a rather straightforward tale in which Batman foils the Clown Prince of Crime's very basic plan to use laughing gas as a cober for a spree of robberies. Indeed, this is all action in a way that, plot-wise, it would have worked well as an episode of the '60s series.

There's a nice bit of rapport between Bruce and the wonderfully sardonic Alfred here, though, as well as the dramatic moment where we're told that the laughing gas can eventually lead to permanent insanity, immediately before Alfred is revealed to have been affected,

There's a nice bit of peril, too, in which Batman is chucked into a barrel which is thrown down to the bottom of the river. It's fun seeing his Houdini act, although a utility belt and boat-cum-submarine are perhaps not the methods Harry would have used.

Overall, then, a basic episode, but an entertaining one. The early 90s are a long time ago, though. The newscaster speaks of people "turning into lunactics" and a "wave of foolish hysteria". Attitudes to mental health are... not quite the same now, which is very much for the best.

The Lord of the Rings- The Rings of Power: Where the Stars Are Strange

 "I'm going to open a First Age bottle!"

Another fascinating episode here, which makes it very clear, seemingly, where the main narrative thread is going. Galadriel is, of course, right that Sauron will seek out Celebrimbor and make more rings- we even get THAT rhyme about seven rings for the dwarves- next on the list- and the nine, those nine, for men.

Yet Gil-Galad is right that Galadriel is vulnerable to Sauron's deceptions. Perhaps Elrond is right about the elves taking the rings,perhaps Cirdan is. We shall see. But poor Celebrimbor comes across asso very naive and gullible here.

Elsewhere, things look bleak for the dwarves of Khazad-Dun, struggling to maintain their home amongsta changing environment- perhaps their seven rings will save them for a while, as did the three rings of the elves. And I'm sure Durin and his royal father, both right stubborn gits, will reconcile... eventually. Durin's being bullied in the mine issad to see.

... And then there's the wandering wizard, who knows not his own name. Yet he explains to his very patient Harfoot friends that he cannot just be given a name: it is his already, and he'll know it when he hears it. This, it seems to me, would not have been said if his name were not known to us.

These scenes in the desert, with bounty hunters searching for them on behalf of some evil widard, feel very Mandalorian, but they're fun.

As, indeed, is the episode. Compared to the first season, a lot is now happening, and the characters are likeable. I hope this streak continues.

Better Call Saul: Namaste

 "It is... acceptable."

Three episodes in, and Jimmy's slow paced morphing into "Saul Goodman isbeing handled well indeed. The scene where he has dinner with Howard is instructive- Howard asks full on why he's changed his professional name, and suggests it's to avoid associations with the name "McGill", Chuck and Howard's very firm.

He's right.

And yet... Howard, ever-gracious and actually pretty decent underneath, offers Jimmy a job. And what does Jimmy do? He uses those bowling balls he bought in the pre-titles to damage Howard's car. Jimmy is now committed to the Saul Goodman path- defending petty, druggy criminals while having links with dodgy people and using dodgy methods, as we (and Kim) see in court. He's far from a decent man, unprincipled, but has found a niche where he can use his actual, salesman type skills as a "lawyer".

Meanwhile, Kim is having actual moral scruples (something Jimmy would never understand) with that man whose home Mesa Verde is going to take. The solution? Jimmy. Ouch.

Elsewhere, it's ten dimensional chess between Hank, who knows games are being played but, well, we've seen over five seasons of Breaking Bad how skilled he is at working stuff out... and a very scary Gus. Giancarlo Esposito once again gives an acting masterclass.

And then there's mike, still not quite trusted after his outburst to Kaylee and clearly upset. And then there's that ending, with him seeming to wake up in an old Spanish mission...

It's exciting seeing the pieces gradually move into Breaking Bad territory, but in the short term I've no clue what's going to happen. And the key to it all is the characters. We know them so well, and they're all so real.

Martin (1977)

 "I shouldn't have friends, even for the sexy stuff."

This is a relatively obscure little curiosity from Geotrge A Romero, with no stars and little budget. No zombies either: this is a vampire film, sort of. And yet, as ever with Romero, it's really about the subtext.

Because there's nothing supernatural about Martin, whatever his elderly cousin, mind addled by religious conservatism and obsession with the supposed family history of vampirism. And yet... this is a self fulfilling prophecy. The disturbed Martin thinks he's a vampire, so he is.

His attacks are horrifying to watch. He doesn't wish to kill his victims, only to drink some blood, but his frenzies have the visual grammar of sexual assault. And the whole look and texture of the film adds to the sense of the disturbed. Low budget, hand held camerawork, naturalistic acting- for what is ostensibly a horror film this is full of realism.... except those monochrome dream sequences from the point of view of Martin's mind,which play with vampite iconography in clever ways.

Of course, the film ends in tragedy. Martin finds human connection in the form of sex, but the lady in question is depressed. She slits her wrists in the bath, and Martin's own elderly cousin blames and kills him. Martin may be disturbed, but is he not a victim too? A victim of backward superstition? And is his elderly cousin, and the old stupidities he represents, the true monster?

A cheap film, yes, but an engrossing and important one. Note to self: watch more Romero...

The Boys: Season Four Finale

 "I used to freak out whenever I saw blood. Now I barely blink at it."

Wow. That's how you do a season finale. Deeply satisfying, emotionally deep, devilishly clever and with the mother of all twists at the end. And, of course, it's about something. Far right skulduggery while certifyuing a US presidential election on January 6th, plus all the horrible Vought propaganda... yeah, this is not too far removed from realty. Indeed, that scene where Homelander is disgusted at Firecracker's coughing and humilates her for it, despite the fact it's a side effect of harmful drugs she's taking so that he can, er, you know... that total, cold ingratitude: he's Trump, isn't he?

The way this plays out is brilliantly done. Before the devastating endfing we have moments of hope. Yes, Annie is disgusted at Hughie for sleeping with her doppelganger, but she doesn't dump him. And Hughie's speech about forgiving a repentant Victoria Neuman persuades Frenchie and Kimiko to forgive themselves- and, at last, kiss!

But this is bleak, and seems to be leading inexorably to a dystopia, with Homelander's puppet as president. Billy Butcher is dying. The anti-supe virus isn't ready. And yet... the assassin is defeated. And Butcher reveals the power he's unknowingly had... and uses it to kill Neuman, a horrible, yet perhaps necessary act from a man who may be opposed to the baddies, but could never be called a hero. And the failure to persuade Ryan- and his casual slaying of Mallory- is horrible. As is Homelander's casual order to kill everyone on staff who knows too much.

So the ending, with Homelander thinking he's lost until Sage turns up and reveals it's all gone according to her plan, is inspired. Dystopia achieved, and Homelander has a newfound awe of Sage.And... most of the Boys are caught, no doubt destined for internment camps. Annie escapes though. And A-Train is out there somewhere. And then there's Ashley, last seen having taken V and undergoing ba horrifying transformation...

This is utter, utter genius telly.

The Lord of the Rings- The Rings of Power: Elven Kings Under the Sky

 "If, as you say, these rings have so quickly turned elf against elf, it would seem he has succeeded".

The first season of The Rings of Power was not always perfect- episodes were overlong, which is a worry here (77 minutes???!), and the season dragged at poinrs. Yet I enjoyed it overall and feel the critics were somewhat harsh. While Amazon Prime dropping three episodes at once(!), just as with The Boys, again plays havoc with my schedule, I'm glad it's back.

And this is an intriguing start. One subplot involves Nuri and the Stranger on their travels, as it becomes clear that the Stranger is indeed a wizard ("But perhaps wizards are not always fair") of some kind, memories or at least impressions beginning to return. I'm sure we shall learn more as the season goes on. Gandalf? Perhaps too obvious. A young, uncorrupted Saruman? We shall see.

We also have the beginning of what promises to be a protracted power struggle between Adar and the being he knows not to be Sauron... yet Sauron, despite his apparent humbling, is ever weaving his webs, from Mordor to the halls of the elves. For we see conflict between Gil-Galad, Galadriel and Elrond, none of whom are quite in harmony. And we see, of course, the three elven rings being finally worn- including, as we would later see in the films, by Galadriel. And, if we did not already know that rings mean temptation, we see a scene in which it literally proves impossible for even the wisest of elves to destroy them....

This episode is superb, visually gorgeous... and deeply ominous. Things are beginning to move towards a Second Age of which we have heard glimpses...

Better Call Saul: The Guy for This

 "It's not about what you want. When you're in... you're in...!"

I often note the artiness of the openings to these episodes, but the one here, with the fire ants climbing last time's ice cream cone as though it were Everest and, eventually, incrementally, disposing of it... wow. That's superb.No sure what it's supposed to conver- the transience of human existence in the wider context of nature?- but wow.

The "a" plot here, with Jimmy, is superbly exciting. Firstly, we get to meet, er, a "younger"(!) Hank and Steve Gomez, but they're just patsies in a plot by Lalo and Nacho (it's short for Ignatio, the penny drops!) to screw over Gus... and, of coutrse, this involves using Jimmy (Saul?) as a lawyer. It look as though this is just the first of many times too. Yet, despite the ethics, Jimmy's lack of real choice and, worst of all, Nacho's truly terrible car interior decor, this is a lucratiuve day for him, pointing towards the future. It's nicely done.

Kim's "b" plot is very different. She seems displeased at having to work for Mesa Verde these days: her heart is in her criminal work, morals above money. And yet, given a morally dodgy job to do- helping evist a man from his house- her attempts to do good are rejected. Is she becoming more Jimmy-like? Is her arc one of eventual corruption and darkness?

Meanwhile, we see very little of Mike... but he's not in a good way. What happened to Werner is REALLY getting to him.

This is a very impressive episode, more so even than usual. Yet I can sort of see where Jimmy's arc is going. Kim's, and Mike's, less so...