Die Another Day (2002)

 "What are you? CIA?

"NSA..."

I was spoilt for choice for quotes. This may not be the best Bond film ever, but it's one of the very best for double entendres.

Yes, I know, it's reputation isn't great. And yes, it's flawed. I sisliked it back in 2002. And yet, on today's second viewing... is it really that bad?

Yes, we have the invisible car and really quite out there sci-fi elements. But I wasn't as bothered about that this time for some reason. And yes, the plot doesn't quite make sense. And it's a bit harsh for Bond to be in the doghouse for supposedly cracking under torture!!!

But I was entertained. Even the universally panned theme song... well, the production is truly horrible, and it's a waste of Madonna to use her in a song like this, but if you look past the horrible autotune and production issues, the song itself is fundamentally good.

Yet we have a good villain, however preposterous his backstory. Halle Berry is... well, adequate as a Bond girl, and gets a nice little scene involving a laser beam that's a nice little homage to Goldfinger. There are some nice locations in Cuba, although by the time we get to Iceland there's far too much CGI. That becomes a problem during the car chase action sequences, too.

And it's all very, very early 2000s, all waterboarding torture and conflict diamonds and smoking at work.

But fundamentally, this film is far from terrible. Perhaps the bad reception was because of everyone now having seen Austin Powers, meaning the format needed to become more serious to survive, and this film is gloriously silly?

The Boys: The Insider

 "Necessity is the MILF of invention!"

Brr. That fascist puppet show is the creepiest thing ever. But it's a sign, yet again, of just how on-the-nose The Boys is on the truly terrifying fascism of Trump and all the other MAGA terrorists.

So much happens in this penultimate episode. There's a shapeshifting baddie. A-Train comes good... and reveals himself as the leak: no going back now. Is this a redemption arc? It's chilling, though, when Starlight says he was "born uppity", just before a distraught Homelander fires Sage, who is . But a depressed Homelander is a dangerous Homelander, especially once he sees what Ryan's done on national TV. All this is at once clever plotting and good characterisation.

Then there's Butcher's collapse, Kimiko's connection with Frenchie over their scared guilt for past murders... and her near death. There's MM coming close to leaving for Belize with his family... but deciding to fight the good fight anyway. This seems ominous. Is he going to die in the finale? Alongside, surely, Butcher?

Then there's Webweaver's humiliating death, harsh even for someone as deeply masochistic as him.... and oh, the Deep. It's almost tragic how his octopus lover gently confronts him about Sage, only for him to instictively end up killing her, her last words being that she loves him... and later on he finds out that Sage has also been doing it with Black Noir. Ouch. The Deep has to be quite the most impressive charcterisation of a truly pathetic, contemptible man I've seen pretty much anywhere.

Gulp. Here comes the finale. It promises to be good...

Update

 I’d hoped to be posting as normal tonight but, alas, I’m utterly knackered after a more than usually long drive.

But the usual schedule will resume from Wednesday- The Boys; Batman:The Animated Series; The Sweeney; Better Call Saul… and the new season of The Rings of Power. 

The Tuxedo (2002)

 "The name's Tong, James Tong."

So I know I'm not blogging much this past fortnight while I'm in full on dad mode and focussing fully on Little Miss Llamastrangler- back to normal sort of schedule from Monday or thereabouts. But last night I happened to see this Jackie Chan film, pleasingly undemanding to my mind which this week is perhaps less prone to being a pretentious git than usual.

This is basically a comedy-cum-action thing where Jackie Chan does his comedy thing of playing an ostensibly hapless protagonist but having a pretext- in this case, basically a magic tuxedo that confers awrsome martial arts abilities on its subject by means of fancy CGI nanobots- and there's basically an action story riffing loosely off James Bond tropes, with a bit of sparks with Jennifer Love Hewitt's Del Blaine which inevitably ends in them getting together.

In short, this is a by-the-book action film of its time, entertaining enough with its CGI insects and James Brown cameo. I enjoyed it... but, well, as action films of the period go, it's fairly anonymous. Interestring, though, to see Chan for the first time in his later, Hollywood iteration.

But what's more interesting, perhaps, is that this film was made just two decades ago... and these sorts of generic, original action films marketed via a star rather than being a sequel or using existing IP are sort of, well, dead.

An Inspector Calls (1954)

 "I don't know anything, not any more..."

I saw the original J.B. Priestley play in the West End, many moons ago, and it made a big impression on me. So much so that, having seen the play once, I was able to recall a surprising amount after a couple of decades, and predict what would happen next.

That is not, of course, to criticise the play, a trenchant commentary on the entitled and sometimes murderous arrogance of those who take their privilege for granted. The world, even in 2024, is full of Eva Smiths, and of Birlings who need taking down a peg or two.

The play suits adaptation to film well, with a number of flashbacks, and the largely character actor cast is solid, with Jane Wenham being particularly impressive. Yet Alastair Sim owns this film. He is menacing, magnetic, charisma itself: the quiet, otherwordly centre upon whom all things revolve. This is a career defining performance.

Guy Hamilton helms the film in a straightforward, unshowy manner, perhaps. Yet that is exactly what is needed here: directorial restraint. Simply using the words and the performances to carry the devastating story is exactly what is needed here. 

After this performance from Sim... it would surely take extreme bravery for anyone else to portray this part on film.It's a rare film which is elevated to greatness by one performance... but this is certainly one of them.

Scanners (1981)

 "You murdered the future!"

Before I get into it... yes, I haven't blogged for about a week and there won't be much for the next week either. Nothing bad, just life stuff.

It's been a while since I blogged a Cronenberg, hasn't it? Don't get me wrong: all his stuff is bloody good. But the early body horror films are particularly delightful... if that's the word.

This film is a masterpiece. The use of the camera and of music, as ever, creates a uniquely Cronenberg atmosphere. Interior spaces always seem so very liminal. And then we have the subject matter... psychic nutters who can read your mind while making you feel ill, move objects with their mind... and make your head explode. There are some deeply effective body horror moments, not least with the duel at the end. Those pulsing veins... brr!

The performances... well, they're generally bland, Michael Ironside and the ever-superb Patrick McGoohan being very much the exception, but it doesn't matter. This isn't a film about characters, about people. It's about themes, the horror, the ongoing mystery and the visuals.

The big reveal at the end, about what's really been going on, is clever, satisfying and topical. Big Pharma can indeed be a bad thing. Just, y'know, don't let that lead you down the rabbit holes of anti-vaxxer nonsense or "alternative" medicine.

Do you feel a nosebleed coming on...?

Batman: The Animated Series- Nothing to Fear

 "I am vengeance. I am the night.I am Batman".

Three episodes in. No Robin this time. We've had Man-Bat. We've had the Joker. Now it's the Scarecrow... and his introduction is excellent, certainly the finest episode so far.

It helps that the animation style used to depict the Scarecrow- less realistic, genuinely using the grammer of horrow, slightly cartoonish- is perfect. Yet the script gives us a perfect introduction to the character. Batman's greatest fear is fitting- the disappointment of his father in the playboy/vigilante he's become- and is perfectly set up.

The rapport between Gordon and Bullock is fun, and I love the early-'90s, mildly sardonic Alfred.

It's also fun to explore the series' visual style, not quite realistic, very much influenced by the Tim Burton aesthetic of the movies. And I was amused at both the airship and the Scarecrow's underlings looking like hoods from the '40s, complete with homburg hats and tommy guns, in a deliberate ambiguity as to the time period.

This episode is a real step up. I'm hoping and expecting now to see just what the hype is about...

The Sweeney: The Placer

 "Jack Regan, this is your life..."

I'm still so behind with The Boys, plus there are only two episodes left... it can take it's natural place in the order in which I'm blogging my varioius shows. So tonight it's back to The Sweeney. 

Anyway, this is a well done episode with Regan undercover trying to sniff out the big boss of a loads of villains, full of twists and turns as Regan takes increasing risks to try and incriminate Harry. It's a fascinating type of episode, at once... well, no so much a woodunit as a "provedunit", and filled with peril as Harry risks exposure at every turn. The scenes where he's caught, yet distracts Harry with his girl's unfaithfulness, are gripping.The conclusion is horrifying and satisfying in equal measure.

Oddly enough, despite fleshing out Regan a fair bit, this is quite narrowly plot,plot, plot compared to many episodes. And Haskins is... well, almost supportive here!

A good episode, then, but not one with much subtext or depth beyond the obvious. John Thaw certainly rocks that moustache, though....

Better Call Saul: 50% Off

 "Dude, that's almosthalf!"

I love these kinds of episodes- slow, building up to something, lots of character stuff, lots of room to breathe.

We're fainly fcusing on Jimmy- busy busy busy with his new, Saul Goodman, type of criminal law stuff, and having to juggle things- proper con man stuff. And, of course, his massive discount sparks off a minor drime wave... but hey, it's all about Jimmy, as ever. Never mind the little people who get hurt.

The relationshiop between him and Kim... well, she's busy and blows off a movie night. Are they drifting apart, with their obvious ethical differences, and that nonsense with the big house being obvious pie in the sky? Well, yes... but we still see him charming her as ever.

It's an interwsting scene with Mike, too. At first we see his wholesome grandad side... but then he lashes out angrily at Kaylee when she asks too many questions about her dad being a police officer. This is a fascinating scene... but I'm sure, too, that it's leading somewhere.

But most fascinatingly, perhaps, we have Nacho. His father threatened by Gus, he has to gain Lalo's trust in order to relay thingsback to Gus... and does so in pretty much the most badass and hugely entertaining fashion possible, in a sequence that has to be the highlight of the episode... but what does he want with Jimmy....

Superb stuff, as ever.

Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991)

 "That's it, then. Cancel the kitchen scraps for lepers and orphans.No more merciful beheadings. And cancel Christmas."

I've seen this film many times, but not since the turn of the millennium. It is, of course, a highly entertaining Hollywood blockbuster, perhaps the most popular celluloid version of the Robin Hood myth. Yes, Kevin Costner is... well, adequate, but we all know the real star is the late Alan Rickman. Was ever scenery chewed with such aplomb? This is one of the finest bits of moustache twirling villainy in cinematic history, and perhaps the performance for which Rickman will be best remembered. 

And it's a fun film, lots of set pieces. It's good. And yet... it drags a bit in places, doesn't it? And... we need to talk about Robin of Sherwood.

Yes, Azeem, the character played superbly by the always excellent Morgan Freeman, is clearly based on Nasir, and no previous version of the legend had included such a character: the film was lucky not to get sued. Yet the overall plot, the feel, and especially the climax feels suspiciously similar to the TV series, right down to the mild fantasy elements in the person of the witch character.

The geography is, of course, hilarious, and not only the start of the film where the White Cliffs of Dover are apparently within easy walking distance of Hadrian's Wall. The implication throughout is that Nottingham is in some way close to London, and that the Sheriff is in some way a figure of national imporance.

The revelation about Will Scarlet is hilarious too. And doesn't quite feel plausible how Little John's merry band so easily accept Robin as their leader.

Despite all that, though... ah, it's fun watch, and what more do we want?

Carry On Cleo (1964)

" Infamy! Infamy! They've all got it in for me!"

Yeah, like any other quote had the remotest chance of being chosen...

We know the format by now- the Carry Ons are six years in at this point, hugely popular... and this is the third instalment in 1964 alone. We know what territory the films can explore- this is the second to be set in the past. The cast is set- although this time Jim Dale is promoted to a more major role and we get a delightful cameo from Jon Pertwee.

We get a load of delightfully awful jokes (a soothsayer who says "sooth, sooth"!) and more fascinating little time capsule nuggets revealing the way things were in 1964- Caesar has difficulties in the senate when talking about the "winds of change" and is heard to protest that "You've never had it so good!" And, well, the less said about Cleopatra's blacked up bodyguard the better. It was another time...

On paper, this should have everything. But, for me, something doesn't quite click here, and I can't really say why. It's not the gleefully deliberate historical inaccuracies. The script may not, perhaps, be as good as other Carry Ons but it's perfectly good. The performances are excellent as ever.

Could it be, perhaps, that while Kenneth Williams is excellent as ever he may be a little miscast as Julius Caesar? Whether so or not, for me this one does,'t quite come off on the whole.

Who on Earth Is Tom Baker?

 "My mother beat me up many times, of course. Things were different in those days, before penicillin."

I last saw this in the '90s at some point, as a teenager. I enjoyed it, certainly, but was looking at it very much through the prism of Doctor Who fandom... which is, of course, a wonderful thing and a big part of my life. And yet... one should see Doctor Who, like everything, in its social and cultural context, and see Tom Baker for who he is: an actor... and a human being. All of which is to say that I thoroughly enyoyed this the second time round.

This is, of course, a thing of joy. Far more than the Dickens and the graveyards and that anecdote about the taxi driver, this is a fascinating look into the mind of a thoughtful, philosophical, cultured and highly intelligent man whose upbringing in such poverty and ignorance gives him a certain understated wisdom and eloquent, hinting at deeper things while deliberately refraining from forthright statements. This is a man who loves ambiguity, to be playful with ideas, who is wary of those wity too much certainty.

His musings on his upbringing, the interlude asa monk, the omnipresence of God, the quality of the bottle of red with which the video ends, the inferiority of sunsets to Turner...one can understand why this man was considered, in his heyday, to be the sort of with who would regularly spar verbally with the likes of Jeffrey Barnard and Francis Bacon after a pint or twelve.

If you can track this down- and there is, ahem, a very obvious place- and you're a fan of Tom, see if you can watch this. It's a thing of wonder.

Alas, it also shows the passage of time. Tom is ninety now. In this he's a fit man in his fifties, and surely 1991 can't be all that long ago...